Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Time for some family input!

As you all know, you're like family to me.
We share our lives, our joys, our struggles, many things.
This is why I value your input on this one :)

This isn't the start of a parenting debate, it's 1/2 for fun but also
to get the wealth of input you all have to offer in my time of need.

Yes, Froglover, I AM doing this, deal with it, and DO NOT forewarn him
of any possible things he may be asked.
That said...

We have a probable male suitor who will be coming to talk with my hubby
and myself about dating our daughter, most likely this weekend.
(poor guy!)

I have come up with a few question for him, just to see how he handles
it and to see and get a little insight into how he thinks. I have checked out his family thru people that know them when his brother was a possibility for our
other daughter but we dodged that bullet :)
(thankfully, he would have driven us CRAZY!)
This seems like a good guy, but if a gentleman caller came calling on
your daughter , what things would you ask this poor soul before giving him
the OK to date her?

I am SO looking forward to all advice/input/cheers and jeers,
let the fun begin, and thanks in advance :)

12 comments:

Lizardmom said...

I even have one question I don't have an answer for, but am thoroughly intrigued to see his expression and how he handles answering it!! :)

Anonymous said...

When my daughter comes home with a guy and he takes her out, I always tell him, "The next time you've got some free time, we should get together and go to the gun range and squeeze off a few rounds with either the 9 or AR15."
I've never had a problem with them getting her home at the required time.

kkdither said...

I have 2 adult daughters. I think you have to hope that by the time they pick someone to date seriously, you have given them the base of your values. What they do with it from that point forward is their business.

My honest opinion? Your daughter is of legal age, right? I say you have to trust her judgment and... sorry, keep out of it. The most loving thing you can do is to be there if it should all fall apart and she needs you.

OrbsCorbs said...

Ask him what he would ask someone who wanted to take out his daughter.

Ask him who he thinks he is and what makes him think he's good enough for your daughter.

Ask him why they call it a driveway when you park on it, but a parkway when you drive on it.

Seriously, I don't know. Tell him if he doesn't behave, he'll have a whole mess of irate irregulars to deal with.

MinnesotaChick said...

No kids, no advice! :D

Good luck FL

Sassa said...

Check their drivers license...incase something goes wrong, or they start to get serious, or (god forbid) c-cap him, and to make sure he is the age he says. Good thing to do if any girl is dating. She should do this herself. Of course the guys don't have to do this because all us ladies never lie. LOL

Beejay said...

I have to agree with kk...If you haven't done your job by now, nothing you say or do will change things.

drewzepmeister said...

Ditto to what KK said...

RWWackoStu said...

Sorry, I dont agree with the "butt out" crew. Your parental responsibility does not end the day she turns 18. In 3 or 4 years (or 6 if it were up to me) I will be interviewing my daughters suitors. At that point I plan to own a gun, (just kidding, I think)and I plan to put the fear of God in him, cause I remember what it was like. If your gut tells you somnething isnt right, listen to it, but also trust your daughter. It's a fine line, but try and walk it. And dont butt out!

kkdither said...

Stu.. you are right. If you gut tells you something is wrong, you must try to intervene. However, this young lady is a very smart girl who handles herself well. Liz already knows the family. I think you need to let Froglover spread her wings (a bit) and make some of her own decisions.

Beejay said...

Again, I agree with kk...I think she has both feet on the ground here.

Lizardmom said...

thanks guys, I appreciate it all .
Today was the day.
He was worried, mind you, she is 20 and he 26. Still a respectable age difference but he seems like a good kid. His family is very well thought of, and he still lives at home.

We asked some of the usual questions, weren't too harsh but dad did show the fangs just enough to give him just enough cause for concern. Fear of dad is a very powerful thing.
2 questions I had that I only had one of the answers for were -

what is the guys role in the dating relationship?
his answer was appropriate - take good care of her, treat her right and have her home on time.
The flip side is usually never thought of, maybe you guys can help, as neither myself or he had an answer but thought it was worth giving thought to -

what is the females role in the dating relationship?

What do you guys think would/should be a good answer for that one? we have another daughter to go thru this with, and more males to talk to I'm sure :)

I trust how we raised her and I trust her, but I feel we have a responsibility to her to sit down with any prospective boyfriends

He made one comment that he has never done this before, that it was usually unsaid and assumed. I try never to assume anything when it come to handing my child, no matter how old, to anyone. It was a good day, we talked for a long time and ended with watching a movie together. The rest is up to them. The interview went well and all were happy in the end :)