Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my fellow survivors of the blizzard of 2015!  How are you?  Actually, for early February, we’re not doing too badly.  There’s snow cover and lots of snow banks, but we’ve generally been in the 20’s and 30’s, temperature-wise.  One of the streets near my home was plowed in better shape right after the storm than it is today.  Maybe snowboarding urchins threw snow back on the street so they could “surf” at night.  There’s hilly terrain here.  I always slow down well before approaching a main intersection.  I’ve seen a few people slide through.  Then there’s no traction as you’re trying to cross this busy street.  Suddenly, the tires catch on the dryer surface of the cross street and you lurch forward.  I’ve seen a lifetime’s worth of idiot drivers in Racine.  The snow and ice just makes them more idiotic.  And dangerous.  I give a very wide berth to anyone I see clowning in the snow in their car and to those who obviously don’t know how to drive.

We have primary elections coming up and Madame Zoltar® endorses Alderman Ed Diehl for Mayor of Racine.  If Mr. Mayor Dickert wins another four years in office, and if at the end of that time (ten years in office), Racine is not a “top ten city,” what happens?  Will someone repay us the wasted tax dollars?  Where do we go for a refund?

In others news, Junior is in love.  Her name is Annette, and he has never spoken to her.  Nonetheless, he’s in “love” with her.  He’s been trying to think of an impressive Valentine’s Day gift for her that he can afford ($13.96).  I said “Gift, schmift, tell her that you’ll put in ten hours for her, doing whatever she wants.  Clean the kitchen.  And then dinner at the Hob-Nob.  For ten hours you are her slave.  Now, that’s a Valentine’s Day gift.”  But first he has to work up the courage to talk to her.  As of this writing, he plans to “trip” and fall in front of her, then get up and introduce himself.  Who knows?  It might work.

I wonder if Señor Zanza will get something for me.  Oh dear, should I be getting a gift for him?  Such are the vagaries of courtship.  Maybe I have something I can regift . . .

Will you, my readers, be my Valentines?  I’ll be yours.  I’m in love with the world, anyway.  Thank you for taking the time to read my blog.

Is it lust or love?  Who the hell knows?

Be careful out there.  There’s plenty of snow and ice to fall or crash into.  When driving, watch out for children.  They’re easily overshadowed by the snow banks, especially at corners. 


lizardmom said...

I'll always be your valentine, Mme. Z!

OKIE said...

As will I Madame Z.

kkdither said...

We have your back, and your heart, Madame.