Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my hot cakes!  How are you?  Summer is in its full glory and I haven’t been bitten by a mosquito yet.  They’re breeding wherever water has collected from our rains.  Soon, West Nile Watch.  “To report a sick or dead crow, blue jay or raven for virus testing, call the Dead Bird Reporting Hotline at 1-800-433-1610.” -  I had no idea there was such a thing as a “Dead Bird Reporting Hotline.”  How about a Deadbeat reporting hotline?  My ex could go to the top of the list for never giving me one red cent to support Junior. 

How can people who are so in love that they marry, but can’t stand each other in a few years?  I heard that a marriage starting today has only a 50% chance of it making it to the end (death).  How can supposedly normal people go from love to hate?  They say that love is blind.  It doesn’t seem to have too much going in the IQ department, either.  Believe me, I know.  I’m a divorcee myself.

There are a whole lot of things taking place in and around Racine this week.  I’m sorry, but I don’t have the time to put together a list.  Try for a peek at some upcoming events.  And, also, the Calendar at the Journal Times:  Racine is party central and there’s always something happening. Of course, more so in summer than winter.  Racine Uncovered and Racine County Eye both give out more stories on upcoming events.

Junior got his tickets for Racine’s Ride the City Slide transferred to the Milwaukee event.  In fact, in a bigger city, he figures he’ll have a better chance of making contact with a “hot girl.”  “Or a hot pedophile,” I said.  Now he maintains that I ruined the event for him because he’ll be constantly on the outlook for fat pedos.  “And what about the skinny ones?” I asked.  He stormed out of the room.

Here’s one of my favorite summer songs:

Thank you for being hazy and crazy enough to read my blog.  I love my Irregulars, I love my regulars, and I love my occasionals.  It’s summer and my love for you is hot.

Old dogs, new tricks:

Keep cool and hydrated, my dears.  Watch out for children playing.  Somehow, one of them always ends up in the street.  Enjoy the weather.  We end up paying for this in winter weather.     


OrbsCorbs said...

Nat King Cole is one of my favorite singers. Thanks, Mme. Z.

kkdither said...

Good morning, Madame. Sorry I missed you yesterday. I was a bit under the beautiful weather. I could have used some of your Yummy Tummy potion, but was out. I may need to visit your cellar and stock up.