Wednesday, October 21, 2015
Dear Madame Zoltar
Our outstanding and other-worldly Green Bay Packers checkmated the San Diego Chargers this Sunday past. Now they have a bye week. Sometimes I don't know if a bye week is good for a team or not. If your team has sustained a lot of injuries, I suppose it's good. But I worry about sustaining momentum with an extra week off.
The momentum must've stopped in the Irregular Football League because the standings remain the same after a week.
Mr. OrbsCorbs contacted me about his shingles in the hope of a cure or effective treatment. I gave him a bottle of Madame Zoltar's® Shingles Shoo-Away™. I haven't seen or heard from Mr. Corbs since. I hope that he realizes that the Shingles Shoo-Away is supposed to be applied topically and not drunk.
After seeing Mr. Corbs' sores, I've decided to get the shingles shot. Some immunity is better than none. I think I'm going to get the flu shot, too. I'll get all shot up.
Junior's been getting all excited about Halloween, but I think he might be a bit old to go out trick or treating. I think I've mentioned in the past that Junior is a bit on the heavy side. He doesn't need the candy and other goodies people will be handing out. Then again, I love chocolate. Maybe I'll accompany Junior. My "costume" is perfect: fortune teller.
No, no, no, I have to lose some weight, too. Señor Zanza eats whatever he wants, whenever he wants, and he stays rail thin. Don't you just hate people like that? It's like they're born with an immunity to fat. Bottle that stuff and become a millionaire. Meanwhile, the same old same old applies to weight loss: diet and exercise. I can't seem to control either. But I think I'm learning not to obsess about it so much. Some of it is a matter of learning to love who I am. I mean, they PhotoShop the pictures of the women on magazine covers to make them appear absurdly thin. No one really looks like that. Accept yourself and improve when and where you see fit.
I've tried reading news stories in an effort to make sense out of what is happening internationally. Forget it. They're nuts. There are way too many factions in way too many countries to figure them out. It just seems like it's war all of the time. Most of us in the West can lead "normal" lives. Where out troops are fighting, though, nothing is "normal" but death and destruction. Many of our opponents claim to be fighting a holy war. Did it ever occur to them that if God wanted something a certain way, it would be so? God doesn't need our help in killing, He needs our help in loving. It's so. so easy to destroy things, and so, so difficult to create them.
Finally, my dears, here's a little picture to make you smile:
Thank you for stopping by to read my blog today. I love readers. I love the Irregulars. I love having your company. Slow down, relax, take it easy.
Do you have a problem? Ask: MadameZoltar@jtirregulars.com
Be careful around the leave piles. When I was a kid, we loved to run and jump into them. And watch out for the shortening day and light. Plan ahead, pray, and hold on.