Yesterday I was in the express check-out lane when I suddenly realized I didn’t have enough money to cover my purchases. This is always embarrassing. You have to decide what to put back. But yesterday, a woman in line behind me asked how much I needed. “At least a dollar,” I said. She gave a dollar to the cashier, who donated 30 cents of his own. So I only had to add 6 cents.
There still are decent people out there.
That night, I called my pal, John, and asked to borrow $20. Then I promptly fell asleep. (Damn this disease!) I awoke at 3 AM to find that John had let himself in and left $20 on the kitchen table.
This is a tough time of year for me because it’s when most landscape projects start. I so miss the soil. I miss kicking my spade into the ground. All of the flowering trees, the sounds of a chainsaw, somebody mowing their lawn – they all get to me.
Yesterday, while driving home from the store, I saw two different people mowing their lawns. I burst into tears and had to pull over.
I gave up landscape to take care of my mother, the woman who gave my toys to other children when I was growing up. What an idiot. I thought there was some honor or something in doing that. Huh. So, instead of enjoying a decent retirement, I’m a pauper most of the time. I must be the only dope who actually believed what the Church was preaching as I grew up. No one told me it was all a scam.