Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my dears!  How are you?  Another crappy day outside.  We had a few really great days and then it hit the toilet again.  I guess we have to pay for a warm winter with a cold spring.  Personally, I believe in climate change and wonder how bad it will get.  The power pigs have made trillions of dollars off of polluting our atmosphere and now we're supposed to just take it.  I'd love to see a mess of CEOs rounded up and placed in the arctic with no tools or food.  You made this mess, assholes, now clean it up.  This reminds me of the fact that when something good happens, someone will say, "Praise the Lord," but when something bad happens, no one says, "Damn the Lord."  That's a nice gig, getting all of the  fame and none of the blame.

Mr. OrbsCorbs contacted me because he's being harassed by a collection agency.  No problem.  I'll just put the dreaded Zoltar Curse™ on them.  They're already half-dead with numerous closed locations.  This should finish them off.  Don't mess with me or my friends!  

Apparently, we already have a new mayor, Amy Connolly.  She has taken over with lying John's blessing.  Of course, she has a shady past and is still under investigation from her old position.  That's the way lying John likes them: criminals.  Racine is a cesspool thanks to lying John.  And now he abdicates.  Gee, if only he would finish out his term, we'd be a top ten city.  Instead, we're a bottom ten city.

I have an idea for the proposed arena downtown.  A recent slideshow on the Journal Times' site was about circuses.  It stated that the three ring tent could hold 12,000 people.  There you go, there's our new "arena."  With so many circuses shutting down, one of those tents should be relatively cheap.  Before we commit to bricks and mortar, we can see what kind of response an arena would generate.  If it doesn't work out, I suggest that we then replace City Hall with the circus tent, for obvious reasons.

Festival time is here. For the next four months or so, there's something happening every weekend in Racine, and many weekdays.  Of course, if you live in the affected areas, they can be a pain in the butt.  I have a friend who lives near downtown and she says it's a mess when the city holds some celebration..  She says that people she doesn't even know will park in her driveway.  I told her to let the air out of their tires.  But she doesn't "want to start something."  I told her that the jackasses who park in her driveway have already "started something."  She's just trying to stop it.

Well, I hear the dirty dishes and carpeting calling me.  A woman's work is never done.  Thanks for reading my blog this week.  I love every last one of you.

Contact madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Enjoy whatever spring weather we get.  Soon enough we'll be complaining about the heat.  Watch out for kids playing near the road.  And take care of yourselves.  Please.   So many of us are always doing for others instead of doing for ourselves.  Well, I give you permission to take care of you, because I love you.
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3 comments:

Tender Heart Bear said...

The weather has been really weird this spring but one good thing is the flowers are coming up and the birds are migrating up this way.

Yes festival time is here too and were we live is no better than downtown.

Anonymous said...

this spring will be known as the mosquito spring, flowers and all

OrbsCorbs said...

Dear Madame Zoltar,

May I smash in the heads of the stupid people I meet every day? Can we make "stupid" a crime?

Love,
OrbsCorbs