Sunday, January 21, 2018

"News of the Weird: Jan. 18, 2018"

The Unkindest Cut of All

Khaled A. Shabani, 46, a hairstylist in Madison, Wis., was arrested on a tentative charge of mayhem and disorderly conduct while armed after an altercation with a customer on Dec. 22. Shabani scolded the 22-year-old customer for fidgeting, then taught him a lesson by using the “shortest possible attachment” to “run down the middle of the customer’s head,” reported the Wisconsin State Journal. Shabani also clipped the customer’s ear with his scissors, and, “While it is not a crime to give someone a bad haircut, you will get arrested for intentionally snipping their ear with a scissors,” reports police spokesman Joel DeSpain.

Least Competent Criminal

When Dustin Johnson, 22, of Minot, N.D., tried to steal $4,000 worth of merchandise from a local Hobby Lobby, he failed to take into account that shopping carts don’t have snow tires. The Grand Forks Herald reported that over a seven-hour period on Jan. 3, Johnson filled a cart and then quickly fled the store—where his loot-filled cart promptly became stuck in the snow in the parking lot, flipping over. Johnson fell down but got up to run—leaving behind his wallet with photo ID matching the shoplifter’s description. Minot police caught up with Johnson at his home.

The Long and Melting Road

It may be cold where you are, but it’s hot in Broadford, a small town about an hour from Melbourne, Australia, where on Jan. 5, the highway began melting. Temperatures of 100 degrees Fahrenheit and higher reactivated an ingredient in the road surface, turning the Hume Freeway into a hot, gooey, sticky mess, 9News reported. Motorists were warned by Victoria police to avoid the area and expect delays over a 10km stretch. Officials also put in place a fire ban and urged people to stay indoors until the heat abated.

The Lucky 1%

Researchers have discovered that 99% of green sea turtles born in the northern parts of Australia’s Great Barrier Reef are now female. Sea turtles’ gender is determined by the temperature at which the eggs are incubated, and warmer temperatures reduce the number of male hatchlings. The author of a new study, marine biologist Michael Jensen, told The New York Times the shift in gender suggests climate change is having a more dramatic effect on sea turtle populations than scientists realized. “We’re all trying to wrap our heads around how these populations are going to respond to those changes,” he said. Researchers warn that continued global warming will threaten the persistence of these populations.

Weirdly Wild Turkeys

Postal workers in the Rocky River suburb of Cleveland were unable to deliver mail to about two dozen homes for three weeks in December and January after being attacked by aggressive wild turkeys. Local ordinances prevented the city from eliminating the birds, so residents were asked to pick up their mail at the post office. Rocky River Mayor Pam Bobst encouraged residents to stop putting out bird food, hoping that would discourage the turkeys from hanging around. “There’s a lot of bird feeders over there, so there’s a food source in that area,” she told The USPS said several carriers were pecked, but no serious injuries had been reported.



OrbsCorbs said...

Who the fuck thinks of crystallizing wasp repellent and mixing it with meth? Or gasoline used in Krokodil?

We had booze, reefer, LSD, some uppers and some downers, and "cocaine."

OrbsCorbs said...

OH, and mushrooms. I wasn't big on the hallucinogens.