Wednesday, May 22, 2019

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, kiddos!  How are you?  Isn't this lovely weather?  Cold and rain.  What is it, November?  At least we've had a couple of nice weekends.  Where the hell is spring?  Please, Mother Nature, come to your senses and straighten out the weather.  I'm tired of dressing for winter in the spring.  And I miss the sun sorely.  Please let that shine a lot.  Please.

Big news: Señor Zanza introduced me to his sister Señorita Zena.  I about dropped my turban.  Suddenly, one day, there's a young woman at the door and its her.  She's traveling the country and stopped to say hi to her brother.  I had no idea that he had any siblings.  He keeps so much to himself.  Anyway, the three of us had some tea and a nice chat.   Señorita Zena. just graduated from college and is going to see the country before settling down.  He major in school was Business Administration.  4.0 gpa.  She won't have trouble finding work.  She just has to make sure that she isn't exploited.

Señorita staying with us for a few days.  She's a pleasant person and I appreciate the company.  Like her brother, though, she's pretty tight lipped about her past.  Did these people just beam down from a UFO?

I read the article in the Journal Times where all the bicyclists were bitching and moaning about the state of our bike pathways.  Once, when driving on Lake Avenue, I was confronted with six kids on bicycles headed straight for me.  They were going the wrong direction, riding six abreast.  I just hit my brakes and waited.  They drove past me, but not without some kicks to the car.  What did I do to them?  What's wrong with people these days?  Everyone is pissed off.

I have some advice for Trump regarding the Iran situation: nuke them.  Just turn the country into molten glass.  Why do we let countries that are smaller than some of our states threaten and cajole us?  They're warning us about the results of war?  My God, squash the bug.  That might make a few other countries take notice.  Maybe some of them will then shut up about us while taking our foreign aid.  If anybody doesn't like it, cut off their aid.  Why are we supporting the countries that terrorize us?  End the madness.  Push the button.

As I read the news in the Journal Times, I get more and more depressed.  Fights, drugs, hit and runs, burglaries, robberies, child abuse and more are in every issue.  Makes me think of moving, but you can't escape the garbage.  People today are proud of their stupidity.  The light turned green the other day and I pulled out into traffic.  Some idiot making an illegal U-turn started screaming and swearing at me for getting in his way.  He followed me for awhile, screaming all the time.  I put the dreaded Zoltar Curse on him and he shut up quick.

The newspaper keeps talking about Foxcon and all the great things that are coming.  Yet, we've seen nothing of them.  So far it's just been talk.  I know that Mr. Mayor Cory Lawn Gnome gets excited by the talk.  He keeps telling us, "Just wait."  Wait till hell freezes over?  All of this bounty has fallen into his lap.  Instead of acting grateful, he acts as if it's all his doing.  Mayor Butterball is for the rich, as almost all politicians.  There's no profit in being for the poor.

That's it my friends.  As always, I'm thrilled and honored to write a blog for you all.  I love you all and God bless you all.

Pray to the sun god, Sol, for some relief.  We should be running around in shorts, not toting our winter coats.   C'mon sky, crack open that gray and let the sunshine in.  People are sick of this, including me.
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