Saturday, October 3, 2009

Still Tasty... Keep it, or Toss it

How long can that bottle of ketchup stay in your fridge before it goes bad? This site lists all kind of foods and how to keep them fresh longer, as well as when to get rid of them. If you have a question, click on the particular picture, and a whole list of stuff appears.............WHAT A GREAT SITE!

Click here to access the site.

Jet-Powered Merry-Go-Round



Sorry for being a blog hog, but no one was posting anything anyway, and I just couldn't resist this one. Every boy wants a jet-powered merry-go-round, and so do some girls, too.

Viral Video Legends Compilation



I think I've seen about one-fourth of those videos, maybe less. You have to watch it twice to get it all.

One Man Band



A video on YouTube calls him "An amazing one-man-band street performer in Rijeka, Croatia:" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXMuWi0dUBc.

I think he's pretty amazing, too.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Introducing This Year's IgNobel Laureates...

Yep, it's that time of year again, time for the IgNobel prizes. These are given annually for the science research that makes you laugh then makes you think.

This year we had a great visual which is making the rounds as Public Health IgNobel winner Elana Bodnar demonstrating a bra that can be quickly turned into a gas mask in an emergency. So you better be nice to your wife or she might not give you one in the case of a gas attack.

The IgNobel Physics Prize was given to Katherine K. Whitcome for determining (analytically mind you) why pregnant women don't tip over.

The Mathetmatics Prize went to Gideon Gono of Zimbabwe's Reserve bank for printing money in denominations from one cent to $100 trillion (can't we all see Dr. Evil with a $100 trillion bill?)

And the IgNobel chemistry prize went to a group from Mexico who managed to create diamonds from tequila. Check out the rest of the 2009 Winners.

The ceremony will be posted online as a podcast and video. They are always entertaining featuring segments such as the "Welcome, Welcome" address, The Big Bank Opera, the 24/7 lectures (24 second technical explanation of a topic followed by 7 words anyone can understand) and the Win a Date With a Nobel Laureate game. Don't worry about the speeches running long...if they do, they have a young girl on hand who will start telling them, "Please stop, I'm bored" repeatedly until they stop talking.

Be sure to check out one of the highlights of the year in science.

#1 on this day

This song hit #1 on this day back in 1982. Gotta love one hit wonders!


Spend Our Money Like You Mean It

"Madison - The Department of Tourism has temporarily sidelined the state slogan, 'Live like you mean it,' as officials ponder its future just months after it was unveiled and then widely mocked.

"The phrase and accompanying logo, showing a silhouette figure doing a cartwheel across letters spelling out Wisconsin, are missing from the department's fall ad campaign and its main Web site.

"Department of Tourism Secretary Kelli Trumble said the department was reviewing the slogan with the state's new advertising firm, Milwaukee-based Laughlin Constable."

http://www.jsonline.com/news/wisconsin/63199077.html


That slogan cost us $57,000. Heck, I woulda let them have "Party on!" for just $25,000.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Thanks alot Jimmy Doyle! (or What Would Johnny Cash Do)


I understand you find yourself in a six billion dollar hole, but did you have to tax my tuneage downloads to close it? For your new IPOD tax, you win the WWJCD bird of the week award!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Interesting Email We Received

Hey JT,

I work for bigMETHOD, a digital marketing agency, representing the new relaxation shot iChill. I saw your post about Drank, the relaxation drink, back in June and thought I’d reach out. [drank - the Anti-Energy Drink]

iChill is a zero sugar, carb, and calorie relaxation shot for the mind and body. I’ve included more information about the relaxation shot and a link to the website in my signature below. Would love to send you a case of the product so you can check it out and if you like it, review on JT Irregulars at some point.

We’ll also be releasing a few humorous videos in the coming weeks, and I’ll keep you posted as they come.

Let me know if you’re interested and I’ll send some samples of iChill your way.

Take Care,
Kelly

Creator Greg Figueroa says, “The market is flooded with energy drinks - sugar-filled, high-calorie, stress inducers. The world is intense enough, why add to it? With iChill, we make it easy for consumers to unwind in a natural way.”

iChill Relaxation Shots combine a natural blend of Melatonin, Valerian root, Rose Hips and B vitamins that are proven to ease anxiety, curb stress and elevate the drinker’s mood. For more information visit www.iChill.com.

As a part of the iChill product launch they are running a sweepstakes for an all-inclusive one-week trip for two to Coco Plum Resort in Belize to users who interact with the brand on Facebook and Twitter. www.iChillBelize.com

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/iChill/102371179422
Twitter: http://twitter.com/ichilldave
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/iChilling

iChill Press Page: http://ichill.com/company/press
--
Kelly Yahr
Public Relations

bigMETHOD
5519 S. Centinela Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90066
www.bigMETHOD.com



Thank you, Kelly. We've decided to accept your offer of a case of iChill. Perhaps we'll distribute it at our next get-together. We'll be sure to sample one and write a review.

We're delighted with the attention. It is very much appreciated.

Oh, and if you could, please don't call us JT. JTI is fine, thank you, or JT Irregulars, or just about anything else, but never, ever JT. Please.

Thank you again for your kindness.

PORK CHOPS?

In a zoo in California , a mother tiger gave birth to a rare set of triplet tiger cubs. Unfortunately, due to complications in the pregnancy, the cubs were born prematurely and due to their tiny size, they died shortly after birth.

The mother tiger, after recovering from the delivery, suddenly started to decline in health, although physically she was fine. The veterinarians felt that the loss of her litter had caused the tigress to fall into a depression. The doctors decided that if the tigress could surrogate another mother's cubs, perhaps she would improve.

After checking with many other zoos across the country, the depressing news was that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment. Sometimes a mother of one species will take on the care of a different species. The only 'orphans' that could be found quickly, were a litter of weanling pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in tiger skin and placed the babies around the mother tiger. Would they become cubs or pork chops ?







Now, please tell me one more time ...

Why can't the rest of the world get along?

"Flap Over 'Homeless' American Girl Doll"

"Some Observers See It as Awareness-Raising, Others Fear It Sends Wrong Message; And Where Do Proceeds Go?

"(CBS) American Girl dolls are expensive and extremely popular - among the most sought-after toys among girls from ages four and up.

"Each doll comes with its own storyline, and a relatively new doll is causing quite a stir.

"'Gwen,' which debuted this year, is portrayed as being homeless.

"In an accompanying book and movie, 'Chrissa Stands Strong,' a friend stands up for Gwen against bullying classmates."

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/09/26/earlyshow/saturday/main5343132.shtml


You could spend $95 on this doll to "teach" your daughter about homelessness. Or you could donate the $95 to a homeless shelter, take your daughter there and show her how you volunteer your services.

Sears Tower-Highest Glass Floor in the World

Not content with having the tallest building in America, the owners of Sears Tower in Chicago have installed four glass box viewing platforms which stick out of the building 103 floors up. The balconies are suspended 1,353 feet in the air and jut out four feet from the building's Skydeck.











Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my crisp caramel apples! How are you? How did your garden grow this year? Mine stunk. Actually, everything did well except for the plants that needed sunlight. Again, though, I will not speak poorly of dear Mother Nature, lest she crash land me over Detroit some night. There’s a nip in the air and the nights are wonderful for sleeping. Autumn almost makes me forget about what immediately follows it. Let’s enjoy the spectacle while we can.

First, my friends, I’d like to comment on an editorial which appeared yesterday in the online edition of The Korean Herald: http://www.koreaherald.co.kr/NEWKHSITE/data/html_dir/2009/09/29/200909290006.asp. After decrying the rising number of my fellow practitioners in South Korea, and disparaging our art and science, the editors of this rag then had the gall to say, “Fortunetellers can do something good to society by giving more encouraging verdicts to our innocent youths with boundless futures.” What? How dare they? They expect me to lie about something as serious as someone’s future just to satisfy their agenda? How could I maintain my integrity, how could I look at myself in the mirror, if I did that? For shame, Korean Herald, for shame! How dare you suggest that I dissemble when predicting the future? For shame!

Next is the sad tale of Janet Lee, at right, a woman with a psychic store in Greenwich Village. “However, the self-proclaimed ‘foremost psychic in New England’ was arrested by Greenwich police over the weekend after detectives said she lied about being attacked in town by rival psychics over the summer.” The grisly details are here: http://www.greenwichtime.com/ci_13440512. It can be difficult at times to sort out the truth amongst competing psychics. And it rarely gets to the point that physical violence is involved. But it is not unheard of, not at all. In a situation like this, I would suggest a few sprays of my MZ Tru-Mist® on everyone involved. Some whiffs of that and they’ll be spilling their secrets for the next eight hours. Though not approved by the courts for interrogation purposes, MZ Tru-Mist® can provide the edge that interrogators need to crack the hardest of eggs and scramble up the truth. Discounts available on volume purchases by military and law enforcement personnel.

And while visiting this subject, I’d like to address the condescending tone displayed in the first paragraph of the above story: “Despite her intuitive powers, psychic Janet Lee probably did not see an arrest in her future, …” Ha. Ha. Ha. How many times have I heard that one? The contempt with which the writer regards her subject is evident throughout. I’d like to explain something to her and to the rest of the jokesters. Psychic predictions don’t just pop into my head to help me or my clients conveniently avoid disaster. Being psychic is more like having a television on with all of the channels going at once. Most of the time, I can suppress most of the noise in order to lead a somewhat normal life. In order to enter that area and sort out a particular “channel” takes skill and daring. To capture a moment or two of the future or past for someone, I must risk the integration of my very self. I do not do that lightly, nor do I charge lightly for doing so. Laugh all you want. My bank manager thinks it’s pretty funny, too.

Finally, I want to direct your attention to this story from the online Romanian Times, “Gipsy women consider themselves inferior to men:” http://www.romaniantimes.at/news/General_News/2009-09-29/3174/Gipsy_women_consider_themselves_inferior_to_men. It simply is horrible to read about the attitudes and condition of these women. They are little more than livestock to their husbands. What a shame that they don’t have access to my MZ Castra-Oil®. Just a few drops applied to the proper area results in a marked difference in behavior (and appearance) within days. Not recommended for use on those below the age of 18 or older than 65. See package insert for details.

Don’t forget Party on the Pavement this Saturday, Oct. 3, in Downtown Racine, dears: http://www.racinedowntown.com/party.html. Although I don’t have a booth in the festivities, I plan on astral projecting onto Monument Square in the early afternoon. Be there, or else.

Be here, too: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.

Keep your buns warm, my friends, and your hearts lit. Düsseldorf!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

It's like an illness



Now I'm decorating for Halloween. I don't even have kids. Last year I scorched the paint with the Christmas lights.

Monday Night Pictures

I saw that the ISS was makinga pass tonight and decided to go outside and check it out. It was only about 20 minutes past sunset, so long exposures to pick up the trail were difficult. Using a zoom and low ISO got some results.

IMG_1731

There was supposed to be cargo ship nearby, but it was too bright to see the much dimmer satellite.

I turned a little to the south of this image and saw the Moon and Jupiter rising over the Rincon Mountains.

IMG_1740

Go out tomorrow shortly after sunset. The Moon will have moved to the east (left) of Jupiter. Should be a nice pairing.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

Microsoft Offers Free Security Software

"REDMOND, Wash. — Sept. 28, 2009 — Microsoft Security Essentials, Microsoft Corp.’s new no-cost, core anti-malware service that helps protect consumers against viruses, spyware and other malicious software, will be available tomorrow, Tuesday, Sept. 29. Microsoft Security Essentials, independently certified by West Coast Labs, is backed by the company’s global security response team and is built on the same award-winning core security technology found in the company’s security solutions for businesses. It requires no registration, trials or renewals and will be available for download directly from Microsoft at http://www.microsoft.com/security_essentials."

http://www.microsoft.com/Presspass/press/2009/sep09/09-28SecurityEssentialsPR.mspx


The price is right.

Monday, September 28, 2009

You Will Allow Me to Shop at Your Store (hand wave)

From the people that can't tell fiction from reality, a member of the Jedi religion is claiming religious discrimination because the British retailer Tesco made him remove his hood in the store.

Tesco spokeman offered the following advice: "If Jedi walk around our stores with their hoods on, they'll miss lots of special offers."

The thigh bone connected to the hip bone

I just spoke with a buddy. He's having surgery tomorrow: a hip replacement. His hip has been aching more and more over the years, much more than you'd expect from his (mostly office) work. It turns out that the hip was malformed from birth and just got worse with time. Cortisone shots, painkillers, blah, blah, are available and were tried to some extent, but he knew he'd have to get a new hip eventually. So he's doing it.

We spoke for awhile and I tried to be of good cheer. He said he was depressed about having the surgery and just wanted to get it over with. Understandble, I guess. Then he said something that surprised me. He said, "I want you to be an additional witness to this." "What?" I asked. He said, "I wrote the doctor a letter and my wife knows and I'm telling everyone I see before the surgery tomorrow: I want the hip bone that they take out of me."

I paused for a second, stunned by the idea, then I burst out laughing, and I laughed and laughed. "No shit?" I asked. "Yes," he said, "yes."

We talked about it. I told him that he should have drawn up papers with a lawyer beforehand, but he insisted that telling and mailing his doctor was enough. He also repeated the notion that he would be telling everyone tomorrow that he wants the bone (top of the thigh, I guess). I said they'd just sedate him sooner if he acted up. I've heard of people getting their gallstones and teeth after removal. Years ago, I think, kids were even given their tonsils in a jar.

My buddy's argument is, "I've owned these bones all my life. They're mine." I assume there are laws regarding the disposal of body parts, organs, whatever, but I don't know. Maybe he has a case.

What is this?



My friend had this bird in her backyard today. I've never seen anything like this in Racine.
Anyone know what it is?

Orbs, you will love this one...

h/t The Washington Times

A teacher was told by a 15-year-old high school sophomore that he was having homosexual sex with an "older man." At the very least, statutory rape occurred. Fox News reported that the teacher violated a state law requiring that he report the abuse. That former teacher, Kevin Jennings, is President Obama's "safe school czar." It's getting hard to keep track of all of this president's problematic appointments. Clearly, the process for vetting White House employees has broken down.

In this one case in which Mr. Jennings had a real chance to protect a young boy from a sexual predator, he not only failed to do what the law required but actually encouraged the relationship.

According to Mr. Jennings' own description in a new audiotape discovered by Fox News, the 15-year-old boy met the "older man" in a "bus station bathroom" and was taken to the older man's home that night. When some details about the case became public, Mr. Jennings threatened to sue another teacher who called his failure to report the statutory rape "unethical." Mr. Jennings' defenders asserted that there was no evidence that he was aware the student had sex with the older man.

However, the new audiotape contradicts this claim. In 2000, Mr. Jennings gave a talk to the Iowa chapter of the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, an advocacy group that promotes homosexuality in schools. On the tape, Mr. Jennings recollected that he told the student to make sure "to use a condom" when he was with the older man. That he actively encouraged the relationship is reinforced by Mr. Jennings' own description in his 1994 book, "One Teacher in 10." In that account, the teacher boasts how he allayed the student's concerns about the relationship to such a degree that the 15-year-old "left my office with a smile on his face that I would see every time I saw him on the campus for the next two years, until he graduated."

Mr. Jennings' denials about these events reveal a lack of remorse. He has not admitted that he made mistakes in this case, and he now refuses to answer any questions about the scandal. Don't forget, this is a presidential appointee we're talking about. Mr. Obama should make clear what his standards are for public servants serving at the pleasure of the president. Encouraging and covering up man-boy sexual activity are serious offenses. The White House should force Mr. Jennings to come clean.

His job in the Obama administration is to ensure student safety, and this scandal directly calls into question his ability to perform that job. Mr. Jennings and Obama administration officials refuse to answer any questions about this newly discovered evidence. A lot of Americans want answers about this guy and how he was approved for a job in the White House.

More Cat Stuff

A little Monday morning humor.....