A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the
morning. The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said
'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up.
husband said, 'Who was that?' The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman
wanting to know if the coast is clear.'
blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk
and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says,
'Hmm, this person looks familiar.' The second blonde says, 'Here, let me
see!' So, the first blonde hands her the compact. The second blonde
looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'
blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys
a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she
finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her
The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'
replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'
A blonde was
bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, 'Go ahead,
ask me, ... I know 'em all.'
A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of
Wisconsin?' The blonde replies,'Oh, that's easy .. it's W.'
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was
A: 'Is it mine?'
Bambi, a blonde in
her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US government class. The
professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision George
Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.'
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house
ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and
reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio,
and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran
out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat
down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to
find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do
they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!'
EVEN IF YOU ARE BLONDE
YOU HAVE TO LOVE THIS:
Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks when a
truck went past loaded up with rolls of sod. "I'm going to do that when
I win the lottery," announced #1 Blonde. "Do what?" asked #2 Blonde
. "Send my lawn out to be mowed."
passed a new ordinance banning weapons in city buildings last week, the
City Council also sent a message to all Racine citizens: Our safety is
more important than yours.
"That’s not only a curious message, it’s an arrogant one.
city aldermen buy into the argument that their safety is at issue
unless they’re allowed to carry a gun into the council chambers to
protect themselves, why should a state-licensed concealed carry permit
holder have any less rights to defend themselves?
"Like many of the disputes around guns and gun controls, we get inflamed rhetoric, emotions and few facts.
Greg Helding, who proposed that aldermen be exempted from the ban on
weapons in city buildings, argued that the exemption was justified
because elected officials can be marked as targets.
"He compared aldermen to courtrooms where judges and district attorneys are allowed to carry concealed weapons.
would submit that judges and district attorneys are usually dealing
with accused criminals and not the interested citizens who normally
appear in the council gallery. Moreover, judges and district attorneys
are in the business of assessing life-affecting penalties — putting
convicted criminals behind bars for years — or making decisions on
things like the custody of children.
"That’s not the same as
deciding who gets a streetlight, a zoning variance or a city permit, and
Helding and the rest of the council members know that.
aldermen get threats from time to time — we get them in the newspaper
business as well. But, unless we missed it, aldermen offered up no proof
of a history of serious threats of death or violence against them
during the debates on this issue. Nor do we recall any incidents of
gunplay in the council chambers in the past few decades.
one could suggest that aldermen themselves have demonstrated more of a
propensity toward violence than gallery onlookers, given the recent
criminal accusations against a couple of the council members. Perhaps
the safest course would be to have a uniformed police officer handing
out weapons to citizens when they enter the gallery.
"We’re not seriously suggesting that, of course.
"But we are serious about suggesting this is merely an exercise in arrogance.
the City Council meetings pose a real danger of armed violence, then
the council should address it either by adding a uniformed police
officer to the council chambers on meeting nights or enforcing the ban
by adding weapon detectors at City Hall.
"That would provide a better defense than armed aldermen and flimsy decals on the City Hall doors."
I about choked when I read the above. I did a double take to make sure it was the Journal Times. This editorial is a sensible response to the hysteria and lies that have been coming from City Hall. I still find it hard to believe that it's in the Journal Times.
If you have been threatened online, please, please, please provide examples. You know, if someone threatens you online, you can get a judge to order the release of the IP address and account name of the perpetrator. So why haven't you done that? Or is this like Dickert's "embezzler"? Making claims with no supporting evidence, so the lie just hangs there in the air, stinking up everything. If Dickert knows of an embezzler, he is morally bound to give that information to prosecutors. Same for online threats. As a member of Racine's blogging community, I don't want people making online threats anymore than Helding or Kaplan do. So please just point out where you were threatened. Please, please, don't let this be another administration lie. Racine is really hurting and we can't take much more of your dishonesty.
I was out this morning doing some errands and I decided to go and investigate how bad the flooding was around here. I haven't finish with the investigating yet. But I decided since I had to come home and drop some things off I would post some pictures for everyone to see. This is what I have taken so far.
This is at Prichard Park
This is on Hwy H north of Spring St.
This is Nicholson Wildlife Refuge
This is the Root River on 5 Mile Rd
This is the Root River on 5 Mile Rd
This is the Root River on the other side of 5 Mile Rd
I will be taking more picture of the Root River on Northwestern and by Spring St. today before I pick Drew up from work. I just can't believe that the last few days did this to our city. According to the weather people on the news we only got four inches of rain. I say B.S. to the weather people on how much rain we have gotten because this is more than what they say. More pictures to come!
Hello everyone! Welcome back to Four for Fridays! It has been a long, dreary and gloomy week. I have been been feeling much like the weather. Looking forward to some sunshine. Anyways, some questions for you....
1) If you could spend five minutes with the president, what would you talk about?
Thank you, Milwaukee, for continuing to pump your raw sewage into our lake. They've had decades to deal with this problem, but not enough politicians have been bribed, so Milwaukeeans pee and poop in our lake. Tons of pee and poop. I suggest putting sewage on the desks of city "leaders." Why can't Milwaukee keep up? No other cities on the lake pump raw sewage into it. Why are they allowed to?
Hello, my drenched dears!How are you?The weather
continues to be a screwed up mess, and not just in Racine.“They” are even predicting snow for later
this week.Nobody is predicting when
spring-like weather will occur.Maybe it
will be cold and damp for months, and then we’ll swing right back into
winter.Oh my, I hope not.
I was saddened to hear that our Ms. kk is feeling under the
weather.With this weather, that says a
lot.I have been pinging you with
psychic good vibrations, my dear.You should
feel better shortly.I’m also sending
out good vibes to Ms. Tender Heart Bear.I know that it’s very discouraging to look for a job these days,
especially in Racine with the
consistently highest unemployment rate in the state.Buck up, dear, good things will come to pass
your way.It’s all a cycle, it’s all
I’ve taken note of the brouhaha occurring at City Hall over
concealed carry weapons.First, there
was the “executive order” from Mr. Mayor Dickert blocking all guns from City
Hall.Now the City Council has voted
that elected officials with concealed carry licenses can carry a gun, but no
regular citizen may.The
justification?Some of them feel
“threatened.”Oh, my Lord, welcome to
the real world.I feel threatened
whenever I leave or enter my house.I’m
much more worried about some meth or crack head toting a gun in my neighborhood
than I am worried about a citizen attending a City Council meeting with a
concealed weapon.How many quick draws
do we have on our Council?If someone
comes in spraying lead, how many will he kill before an alderman takes him
down?Someone has been watching too many
Steven Seagal movies.
I also received an anonymous email this week:
Dear Madame Zoltar,
How can I convert myself to the Dark Side?Instead of complaining about city government,
I’ve decided to join them in the fleecing of the citizens.So, what do I do now?Should I ring up Dickert and announce that
I’m on his side?If so, would it be rude
to ask about money at that time?Or should
I wait and just accept whatever they offer me?I need to do this quickly because I’m broke and the bills have to be
Please advise me at your earliest convenience.
Dear OC, are you sure you want to lose your eternal soul in
exchange for dirty money?Believe me, it
looks like fun now, but when it comes time to pay the piper, there is hell to
pay.Satan has no mercy.There will never be an end to your misery in
the afterlife.Maybe you’ll have to
watch City Council meetings for eternity.How gruesome!
Think it over, OC.Let me know what you decide.
Thank you everyone for visiting my blog today.I love my Irregulars and regulars and odds
and ends.You make my day.
Whether you're a "bird person" or not, this is
stunning!!! Not to detract from the sheer magic of it, but in practical
terms, how many trips would a bird have to make with that tiny
little quantity of mud/clay it could carry? (and how far from the nest is the source?)
If you take the construction of a "circular bowl"
in your stride as instinctive – how the heck does the bird come up with the windbreak/entrance design that shields the eggs/chicks from the elements – and at what point in fashioning the bowl do they start to construct it?
All Photos are property of Daniel Carbajal Solsona and
posted WITHOUT his permission….SER.
The threshold of winter has already begun to lose its grip across Southeastern Wisconsin. The warmth of the April sun has been melting ice and snow, flooding the country farmlands into ponds and streams. The landscape is stark and barren, browned and dusky green. Somewhere the buds are pushing up to kiss the sunlight, but not just yet....
The floodgates have opened. A multitude of birds have arrived and are passing through. The spring migration is here! Aside from the obvious hordes of Robins and Red Winged Blackbirds that are congregating on the countrysides, I've seen dozens of Tundra Swans, Wilson's Snipes, rafts of Canvasbacks, Ringed Necked Ducks, Ruddy Ducks and Northern Shovelers making the flooded farm fields their pit.stop. I've seen Red Breasted Mergansers and Redheads in the harbor, with their plumage all colorful are bright, courting away. The Sandhill Cranes, Eastern Meadowlarks and Killdeer have arrived, overtaking the open fields. Tree Swallows, Eastern Phoebes, Hermit Thrushes and Great Egrets are trickling in. Pretty soon the warblers, the catbirds, the flycatchers and the orioles will arrive... It's only the beginning!
The war between spring and winter isn't over yet! Jack Frost still has his stronghold over the northern parts of the state. The lakes are still frozen and the land snow covered, thus creating a paradox. A natural traffic jam of sorts. A gridlock. The Common Redpolls, Dark Eyed Juncos and the American Tree Sparrows should be gone by now. They are still around. It is perplexing to even the most seasoned birder to see a junco and a swallow in the same field....
A few seem to have escaped the borders already... The famous Great Grey Owls of Mauston and Middleton have fled the paparazzi of photographers, after making the winter the biggest owl migration since 2005. The Rough Legged Hawks, Northern Shrikes and Snowy Owls are nowhere to be seen. Let's hope their journey home is a success.
So the time is now to keep an eye on the skies, Rare birds are more common in this time of the year as winds may carry them to strange lands. Never know, one could up in your back yard!
About these pics... The top pic is an Eastern Bluebird taken at Grant Park in South Milwaukee on 4 7 2013. The top middle one are Northern Shovelers taken at the pond on 2 Mile Rd in Raymond. The bottom middle one is a Sandhill Crane taken at Bong on 4 4 2013. Below is a Barred Owl taken Up North at my folk's place on 3 30 2013
"Bianca Nogrady "ABC "After aeons of speculation, science has finally
answered the biggest question of all - Does penis size matter? - with a
"Australian researchers have found that penis size is just as
important as height when it comes to female assessment of male
attractiveness, and that bigger is indeed better - to a point.
"The results of the study, which asked a group of women to rate the
attractiveness of a series of computer-generated images of varied
height, body shape and penis size, are published today in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science . "'We found that flaccid penis size had a significant influence on male attractiveness,' the authors write. "'Males with a larger penis were rated as being relatively more attractive.'
"'Our results directly contradict claims that penis size is unimportant to most females.'"
Every Wednesday, Madame Zoltar responds to your queries and comments in her blog, Dear Madame Zoltar. Are the stars in your favor? What to do with that 401K? Find out by sending your questions and thoughts to: firstname.lastname@example.org
"The famed Bald Eagles from Decorah, Iowa are back on their nest and ready to start a new family! World famous and live streamed via the internet by the Raptor Resource Center, anyone can view the parents raise their eaglets from egg to fledglings from the comfort of their homes. Using infrared cameras and microphones, the eagles can be seen around the clock during the nesting season, which starts in January or February and runs till June."
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