Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my torrid tulips! How are you? I had a great time last week – in Aruba! I don’t know if you noticed, but my last couple of blogs were kind of ‘down.’ I started to think about maybe sneaking away for some time just for me, and the next thing I knew, I was flying south, and not under my own power. Things fell into place conveniently: Junior already had plans to spend the week at a friend’s house, the business is slow and doesn’t need my constant mothering right now, and I had a rash of cancellations of readings and personal consultations. I also won a couple thousand dollars on the lottery (oh my, how did that happen?), which financed my getaway.

At this point, I’d like to say that the enhanced security measures at our airports are beyond impressive. Way beyond. I was frisked, x-rayed, body scanned, psychoanalyzed and cavity-searched. I told them to forward the results to my physician so I won’t have to pay for tests the next time I see him. Hmph! They must have thought it was odd when I commented on my flying abilities in the astral plane. I will grant you that I am unique, but I hardly fit the profile of a terrorist. I don’t envy those government employees now. Beware the Zoltar® Curse!

Aruba, though, was wonderful. It was warm, it was dry, it was heaven. I met all sorts of interesting people. I also spent an incredible night at a place called the Sopranos Piano Bar (yes, those Sopranos: http://sopranospianobar.com/frontpage/). Oh my, I don’t know how many Tsunamis I drank. It all became a blur towards the end, but I do remember one handsome gentleman telling me that the Kama Sutra has nothing on the Cosa Nostra. Those island breezes (and rum cocktails) can play tricks with your head and your heart. Before I knew it, that gentleman and I were moving to the rhythms of the native beat, if you know what I mean. It was hot and sexy and sexy hot. Oh dear. Anyway, a smart lady is prepared and so I was and so was he. I don’t even remember his last name (if he even told me), but I really don’t care. It was right for the moment and the moment was right.

Am I overusing that literary device? Or is the device overusing me?

Upon returning home, I read about the brouhaha over the Laurel Clark Fountain. How disappointing for the children (and adults) who liked to play there. It’s OK, I guess, to just sit and watch the fountain, but I think the temptation to have some fun will be harder to resist in the hotter months. I’m going to spend a little time meditating on a hero to save the day for the fountain and Racine’s kids. Maybe someone will step forward with a little psychic prodding. Wait and see.

Did I mention my tan? Oh my, I don’t want to drone on about my trip, but I look darker than midnight in a coal mine. Aruba has some topless (and bottomless) beaches, so no tan lines. Oh my².

Thank you my dear Irregulars for spending some time with me this week. Thank you for remaining loyal while I took a week off for fun in the sun and love in the sand. I also love each and every one of you. I look forward to seeing you all at the upcoming get together.

Remember to send your losing lottery tickets to: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.

Enjoy the beauty and bounty of spring. It is here but a short while before summer saunters in. Then it will be time for the Christmas displays in stores again. Papiamento!

7 comments:

Beejay said...

Glad you had such an enjoyable time in Aruba. Aaaah...sunshine and neurotic drinks...isn't that the life.

OKIE said...

Aruba is most definitely on my wish list of places to go.
Glad you had a wonderful time and am very glad you are back Madame.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you had a nice trip Madame. You didn't run into any of those Voodoo guys did you? If they found out you were the one and only glass ball gazer, they may have not taken kindly to that (you know, the little doll and pins thing).
I've been to Aruba too. Beaches are nice. I was told staring at the "scenery" would make me go blind.

hale-bopp said...

I island hopped from St. Croix to Trinidad and points between when I was down there, but never got to Aruba.

The literary device you are using is called an antimetabole. I blogged about this during the 2008 election season since there was a bit of antimetabolizing going on in some of the election rhetoric!

SER said...

I am glad you had a good time and finally figured out those lottery numbers!

OrbsCorbs said...

Party on, Madame Z!

Anonymous said...

Thank you everyone for your wonderful comments. I love you all.

I have respect for voodoo and voodoo has respect for me.

I like antimetabole and antimetabole likes me.

I have to be careful about predicting winning lottery numbers. That's considered bad form by respectable psychics. I could lose my license.