Saturday, July 25, 2009

"Redesigned Journal Times Web site set to launch"

Towards the end of the article:

"Through our parent company Lee Enterprises, The Journal Times is part of a consortium that has entered into a partnership with Yahoo!. Yahoo! built one of the most technologically advanced online advertising systems currently available. The amazing system, called Yahoo! BT (BT stands for Behavioral Targeting), will allow Journal Times advertising clients to have their ads displayed to Web site users in the 'buying cycle' for specific goods and services.

"For example, the new Yahoo! Behavioral Targeting system can determine that a user has been searching for a new Ford F-150 truck somewhere on the Internet. So when the user visits The Journal Times’ site, they will be served an F-150 ad. This type of targeting extends into demographics, geography and consumer buying patterns in multitudes of business categories. The Journal Times is the only company with the Yahoo! BT system in Racine County.

"The end goal of these new systems is to provide online readers and advertising clients with the best possible products. The Journal Times team works hard to produce the best local newspaper and Web site every day and appreciates your readership."

Oh yeah, "Behavioral Targeting" sounds like a good idea.

It will be interesting to see what the new site looks like.

A New Way to Walk Your New Bride to be Down the Aisle.


Dear Abby,
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby,
What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence on my VCR?

Dear Abby,
I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.

Dear Abby,
I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby,
I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby,
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby,
I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby,
My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby,
I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental pause.

Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

The new bridge at the Hoover Dam

THE WIDER VIEW: Taking shape, the new bridge at the Hoover Dam

Creeping closer inch by inch, 900ft above the mighty Colorado River, the two sides of a $160million bridge at the Hoover Dam in America slowly take shape.

The bridge will carry a new section of US Route 93 past the bottleneck of the old road which can be seen twisting and winding around and across the dam itself.

When complete, it will provide a new link between the states of Nevada and Arizona. In an incredible feat of engineering, the road will be supported on the two massive concrete arches, which jut out of the rock face.

The arches are made up of 53 individual sections, each 24ft long , which have been cast on-site and are being lifted into place using an improvised high-wire crane strung between temporary steel pylons.

Spectacular: The new Hoover Dam bypass:

The arches will eventually measure more than 1,000ft across. At the moment, the structure looks like a traditional suspension bridge. But once the arches are complete, the suspending cables on each side will be removed.

Extra vertical columns will then be installed on the arches to carry the road. The bridge has become known as the Hoover Dam bypass, although it is officially called the Mike O'Callaghan-Pat Tillman Memorial Bridge, after a former governor of Nevada and an American Football player from Arizona who joined the US Army and was killed in Afghanistan.

Work on the bridge started in 2005 and should finish next year. An estimated 17,000 cars and trucks will cross it every day.

The dam was started in 1931 and used enough concrete to build a road from New York to San Francisco. The stretch of water it created, Lake Mead, is 110 miles long and took six years to fill. The original road was opened at the same time as the famous dam in 1936.

Information source unknown......

A New Olympic Sport

For those that are bored with synchronizes swimming and underage gymnasts, there is now a movement afoot to get pole dancing in the Olypmics. They are collecting signatures via an online peteition. No nudity, but all the usual moves you are used to seeing. In addition to IOC approval, they have to come up with an anti-doping policy for pole dancers.

Just b*tchn & complaining

So, why do people think they can complain and spread their phobias to children?

Friday, July 24, 2009

Laws of Life

Law of Mechanical Repair-After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

Law of Gravity
--Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability
-The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of Random Numbers
- If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

Law of the Alibi
-If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law
--If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

Law of the Bath
--When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters
--The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result
--When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics
--The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theater and Hockey Arena
-- At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last and they are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over while those in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and who stay to the bitter end of the performance and beyond. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

The Starbucks Law
-- - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers
-- - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Physical Surfaces
-- -The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Logical Argument
-- -Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law of Physical Appearance
-- -If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

Oliver's Law of Public Speaking
-- -A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy
-- -As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

Doctors' Law
-- -If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

Joan Jett & the Blackhearts - I Love Rock N Roll

Here's a video of the same song that they released 13 years later in conjunction with the movie Wayne's World 2:

Racine Police Scanner Link Added to JTI Sidebar

On the left, just above Madame Zoltar's ad.

Click on the link to listen to the Racine police scanner on your Windows Media Player.

If you have a problem with the link, you can listen to a web player, or select feeds for other players (Real Player, iTunes, Winamp), here:

Wow! Jupiter's Black Eye As Seen By Hubble

Just a very quick post. They got a picture of Jupiter's recent collision with the Hubble Space Telescope.

Wow! Look at that detail! This was taken by the Wide Field Planetary Camera 3 (WFPC 3, or "whiff pick" if you want to sound cool) which was installed on the mos recent servicing mission. The camera has not been fully calibrated yet, but they couldn't pass up this opportunity so an imperfect image is better than none (although its hard to argue with this image too much!)

Now if only these clouds would clear so I can try to shoot it here!

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

What if they held a bicycle race and nobody noticed?

Two comments on the Journal Times' story before the race and seven on the Racine Post's (including one from Pete). No comments on either's coverage after the race.

All you have to do is whisper "Adrial White" and people fall all over themselves to say something.

Gee, I wonder what is important to the people who actually live in Racine, Wisconsin?

Gunfire in the hood again last night.

Party on, party on.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Some of National G's Best

Pimp My Garage Door!

hahaha.. some of these are pretty cool!

Hawaiian Starlight

The Canada-France-Hawaii Telescope (CFHT) produced a video called Hawaiian Starlight for the International Year of Astronomy. We just had a lunchtime screening of the movie today for observatory employees.

Hawaiian Starlight consists of time lapse photography of the mountain interspersed with images from the heavens. There is no narration at all so this is intended more as a visual treat than a serious educational video. But is sure is a sweet visual treat! You can see clouds rolling around the mountain, telescopes tracking stars through the night, sunrises and sunsets, the movement of the stars (sometimes they show you star trails, sometimes not) from many different vantage points around the mountain. Look closely at some of the time lapse sequences and you can see planes taking off and other planes passing over on trans-Pacific flights.

The video is about 40 minutes long and you can buy it online. Minor complaint is that they have only done a standard DVD...I think this would look sweet on Bluray. I applaud them for making the DVD region free (although be sure you get the NTSC or PAL version depending on where you live!)

They don't have the movie online, but the trailer gives you a nice sample.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

How Regional Solutions Work in S.E. Wisconsin

"Milwaukee County Board Chairman Lee Holloway named himself and Supervisor Michael Mayo Sr. to the Southeastern Regional Transit Authority, he said Thursday.

"The appointments made good on Holloway's threat to do so and use them as a platform to block progress on funding for a commuter rail link between Milwaukee and Kenosha until a deal is made to give state approval to a local sales tax for transit.

"Holloway has been critical of Gov. Jim Doyle for vetoing legislation that would have authorized a 0.5% increase in the local sales tax to pay for transit."

According to the Journal Times:

“'To be clear, I am not opposed to the KRM line. In fact, I support it. But supporters of the KRM must first fix the bus system, otherwise the KRM will never happen,' Holloway said in a news release.”

So he gets to appoint himself to an "authority," and then says no KRM until "we" fix Milwaukee's buses.


More Free Advertising for the Beautiful People on Racine Post

Sorry, that's not a real link above because I don't want our site reported for "link spamming" again. You'll have to copy and paste it.

What is that, like the fifth article on the Ivanhoe? If it doesn't happen in city hall, downtown, or on the lakefront, it doesn't really happen in Racine, right?

What about all the other taverns in town that are also adjusting to the economy; you know, the bars that 99% of Racine's drinkers patronize?

Party on - but only in downtown, and only with the "right" people!

Baby Bunny Stolen from Waukesha County Fair

"Waukesha — For 9-year-old Jayden Rajnicek and her mom, Karin, winning honors for their prized rabbits at last week's Waukesha County Fair was a thrill.

"The excitement quickly wore off, though, after someone snatched one of the rabbits' baby bunnies from a cage in the goat and rabbit tent, Waukesha County Sheriff's Detective Steve Pederson said Wednesday.

"Cracker, a 7-week-old female Holland Lop, was in a cage with its mother and two male siblings, Marshmallow and Chocolate, when she was taken sometime after 10 p.m. Friday and before 7:30 a.m. Saturday, Pederson said. The father was in a cage next to the mother and babies."

I really, really, really hate thieves. Really.

Electronic Cigarettes

I didn't even know that there were e-cigarettes until I saw this video. Here's Wikipedia's entry on the subject:

Can e-booze and e-drugs be far behind? That will give new meaning to the phrase "turning on."

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Jupiter Gets a Black Eye

A few days ago, amateur astronomer Anthony Wesley of Australia was imaging Jupiter and found a new dark spot. The spot instantly conjured up memories of the impact of comet Shoemaker-Levy 9 some fifteen years ago.

Follow up images confirmed the discovery and that it was an impact (as opposed to a weather related dark spot). NASA's Infrared Telescope Facility on Hawaii captured a good image of the impact.

You can see the bright spot where it hit and some debris heading to the northwest (upper left) from the impact. If the image looks a little funny, that's because it was taken in infrared light (1.65 microns fro those in the biz).

This could be a boon for astronomers. It happened fifteen years ago, but you always want more data...after all, you need a sample size bigger than one (well, technically Shoemaker-Levy 9 had a bunch of different impacts). Astronomical instruments have advanced tremendously in the last 15 years so we are bound to get more and better data this time.

It sure is nice that we have a big planet like Jupiter out there...its gravity helps protect Earth from impacts by sweeping up debris or ejecting it from the Solar System entirely. Studying these impacts can only help when we find one with our name on it.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

Sometimes We all Need a Little Help

Layla sent me this, I thought is was too cute not share....

New Survivor Show!

Just for all you Moms out there......

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and
3 kids each for six weeks.

Each kid will play
two sports
and either take music
or dance classes .

There is no fast food.

Each man must
take care of his 3 kids ;
keep his assigned house clean ,
correct all homework ,
and complete science projects ,
cook , do laundry ,
and pay a list of 'pretend' bills
with not enough money.

In addition, each man
will have to budget in money
for groceries each week.

Each man
must remember the birthdays
of all their friends and relatives ,
and send cards out
on time--no emailing .

Each man must also
take each child to a doctor's appointment ,
a dentist appointment
and a haircut appointment .

He must make
one unscheduled and inconvenient
visit per child
to the Urgent Care.

He must also
make cookies or cupcakes
for a social function.

Each man will be responsible for
decorating his own assigned house ,
planting flowers outside
and keeping it presentable
at all times..

The men will only
have access to television
when the kids are asleep
and all chores are done ..

The men must
shave their legs ,
wear makeup daily ,
adorn himself with jewelry,
wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes ,
keep fingernails polished
and eyebrows groomed .

During one of the six weeks ,
the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches,
and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or
slow down from other duties.

They must attend
weekly school meetings ,
church , and find time
at least once to spend the afternoon
at the park or a similar setting.

They will need to
read a book to the kids
each night, and in the morning,
feed them , dress them ,
brush their teeth and
comb their hair by 7:00 am.

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information:
each child's birthday,
height, weight,
shoe size, clothes size
and doctor's name.
Also the child's weight at birth,
length, time of birth,
and length of labor,
each child's favorite color,
middle name,
favorite snack,
favorite song,
favorite drink,
favorite toy,
biggest fear and
what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off the island
based on performance.
The last man wins only if...
he still has enough energy
to be intimate with his spouse
at a moment's notice.

If the last man does win,
he can play the game over and over
and over again for the next 18-25 years
eventually earning the right
To be called Mother!


I figured if we're going to have a blog entitled "Tequila," then we need this one, too.

Actually, this is about Oakland, California, which just passed a new tax on medical marijuana. You can read the AP news story here: Oakland voters pass pot tax to boost city coffers. The measure passed by an 80% margin and is expected to raise nearly $300,000 in its first year.

Good for them. It is about time that common sense starts to prevail in the debate over marijuana.

Party on, potheads!


EDIT: Or you can watch the AP news story here:

I checked the AP videos for this story earlier, and there was nothing.

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my tasty Pop Tarts! How are you? I certainly have enjoyed the scenery in Racine lately. Did you see all those athletes in town for the triathlon over the weekend, and tomorrow for the bicycle race? That’s a lot of beefcake on the hoof, girls.

Let me tell you the big news! I’ve been contacted by Michael Jackson from the great beyond. He came to me suddenly, in the middle of a reading I was doing for a former politician in Racine. I was so embarrassed. “Why now?” was all I could think. Anyway, I’ve managed to re-establish contact with the King of Pop and he has given me permission to put a select group of people in touch with him. A very limited number of fans will be allowed to contact the dearly departed Mr. Jackson, through me, for a very reasonable stipend. Mr. Jackson will answer your questions and queries personally, through me. Do not miss your chance to get in on this amazing deal. The dead reserve the right to withdraw this offer at any time. As is customary, a 50% discount applies to all Irregulars.

Oh, and if you’re interested, I can contact Farrah or Ed McMahon at even more reasonable rates. They’re toll-free.

Given the times that we live in, I’m not surprised that more people are trying to stretch their psychic dollar to get the best return on their investment. That’s why all Zoltar® brand products have been discounted 10 to 25%. I want my clients to receive the best clairvoyant care available today, whether they can afford it or not. The Zoltar™ name is your assurance of the finest quality paranormal materials and wizardry. Why buy that cheap, substitute Brand-X quackery, when you can afford the very best? Zoltar©. Remember, my personal guarantee goes with every one of my products: You will be completely satisfied with your purchase, or I’ll change your mind.

Sorry for the promotional plug, dearies. I have to make a living, too.

Nobody had any pressing problems or burning issues this week. It’s nice to know that the Irregulars are doing well.

I also wanted to weigh in on the 40th anniversary of the moon landing. Hurrah, hurrah! I cheer for this accomplishment today just as I did forty years ago from the lunar ether. Hurrah, hurrah!

Finally, I want to share a website with you,, that is a lot of fun. Here is their Beer Bottle Routine:

Thank you all for reading my blog this week. Don’t forget to send me your deepest, darkest thoughts:

Keep an eye out for those bicycle boys, dearies, and don’t forget to look both ways when crossing the street. Enchilada!
After going through a virus attack,
losing a hard drive,
fighting off hackers,
upgrading all my software,
installing fire-walls,
Being threatened with being cut-off by my email provider,
and a host of other problems...

I have fixed my computer...
and NOW it works exactly the way I want it to!

Manure... An interesting fact

Manure: In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large shipments of manure were common.

It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by-product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM!

Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined just what was happening

After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term 'Ship High In Transit' on them, which meant for the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the
hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane.

Thus evolved the term 'S.H.I.T', (Ship High In Transit) which has come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.

You probably did not know the true history of this word.
Neither did I, I had always thought it was a golf term.

Monday, July 20, 2009

"We were surprised because it's so big" (That's what she said!)

And that can only mean we have found the world's oldest penis, and I don't mean some old guy so you can stop picturing that right now. I am speaking evolutionarily here.

An Australian paleontologist ironically named Dr. John Long found "a specimen with an undoubted clasper with a knobbly end". A group of placoderms called arthrodires that lived about 400 million years ago now hold the record as having the first penis used to fertlize eggs in the female, and it's even "erectile".

Let the inappropriate jokes fly!

One More

Rush "Making Memories"

Just cause im in a mood

I need some Boss:

Moon + 40 years

How cool would it have been to be there. Here is to them.

Under The Milky Way by The Church

Adam Yauch (MCA) has cancer

MCA of the Beastie Boys (Adam Yauch) has throat cancer. I was at the BB opening tour show at the Mecca in 1986 (Yeah im that old). Always have been a hip hop fan and the BB have always been lyrical masterminds. Please enjoy one of my faves "Sure Shot"

And they accually are good musicians. They put put an instrumental album in 2007 that won a grammy. Please enjoy "14th Street Break"

Monday Nights Lost Video

Cant get this one out of my head. Now your all infected too. Geggy Tah - Whoever you are.

Life really boils down to 2 questions...

1. Should I get a dog....?


2. Should I have children?

Who Needs Botanic Gardens?

Just go to 1000 Wisconsin Avenue:

I've met the owner, but didn't ask for permission to publish the name. The landscape around this little home is remarkable. It's ever-evolving, and literally changes by the day at this time of year. Stop by and see what's in bloom. Stop by again in a month and it will be a different show.

Head Jukebox

Two songs have been running through my head. One I woke up to on Sunday morning, and the other keeps going through my head as I read the hate and venom that keep flowing from the Right. Both are great oldy moldies. Classics. Glad my memory has such a large play list as I'd truly miss music if it didn't