Saturday, December 15, 2012

"Adam Winrich: Whips and Harmonica"



I think if I tried to do that, I'd swallow the harmonica.

"Devil otter ate my mini van"


http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3535017/Otter-goes-on-the-rampage-in-Irish-village-attacking-farmer-and-his-van.html

As if there isn't enough trouble in the world . . .

I HATE being @#%^@Q!& up.

As this crap progresses, things get worse and I never notice.  Bought a new small ceramic space heater, and gave myself a second degree burn.  NEVER felt a thing.  At everyone's insistence, I will hit the ER tomorrow during the game.  I've heard it's the least busy time.

Open Blog - Weekend


You, too.

Friday, December 14, 2012

"Prayer vigil at Monument Square Sunday"

From The Journal Times.com:

"The Racine Interfaith Coalition will hold a prayer vigil in memory and honor of the lives lost and those who mourn over the school shooting in Newtown, Conn. It will be held at 6 p.m. Sunday at Monument Square."

http://www.journaltimes.com/news/local/prayer-vigil-at-monument-square-sunday/article_e05a7658-464e-11e2-b033-001a4bcf887a.html



"Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him; better take a closer look at the American Indian."
 
Author Unknown

Four for Fridays

Hello everyone and welcome back! It's been a week of running around and chasing from store to store. Tis the season huh? Anyways, some questions for you....

1) If you could be famous for doing anything, what would you want it to be?

2) Is it easier to win or lose with grace?

3)  When was the worst storm you where ever in?

4)  What is the one thing you miss the most about being a child?

Enjoy your weekend!

Open Blog - Friday


Another Betty Boop sighting.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Irregular Football League Standings


Go, team, go!

toilet seat

 
A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away
to paint the toilet seat. After he finished, he headed to the
kitchen to raid the refrigerator.

The wife comes home sooner than expected, and heads to the
bathroom, sits down and gets the toilet seat stuck to her rear.
She becomes upset and in a panic shouts to her husband to drive
her to the doctor. She puts on a large overcoat to cover the
stuck seat, and off they go.

When they get to the doctor's office, the man lifts his wife's
coat to show their predicament.

The man asked, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this
before?"

"Well, yes." the doctor replied. "But never framed."

Veteran's Day picture


Veteran's Day picture: A boy chained his bike to a tree and then went to fight WWI.
 
The tree is on Vashon Island, which is between Tacoma and Seattle, Washington.
 
 

My First Time Lapse (and a few Geminids)


With the rise of social media, events such as meteor showers get a lot more publicity than they used to so many of you may know by now that the Geminid meteor shower peaks on the night of December 13th and into the morning of December 14th. The Geminids are a very active shower but not as famous as the August Perseids, probably because for many people in the northern hemisphere, it is colder in December! Well, in Tucson, it is still pretty warm and humid in August and can be quite cloudy. The Geminids frequently feature clear skies and sometimes (like this year) pleasant temperatures.

Well, sometimes that is. The forecast for tomorrow night, the true peak, is for a 100% chance of rain in Tucson. Fortunately, the Geminids have a fairly broad peak so I went out tonight. Very good show, easily averaged a 2-3 a minute over an hour and a half or so. And I had my camera set up snapping away. It took a series of 40 second exposures, 138 total pictures (adds up to about an hour and a half of pics) before the battery died.

I was at Saguaro National Park East. After I was out there for a little while, the cops showed up. They checked out what I was doing and then I think arrested someone who was sitting in a car drinking (I head them talking about finding vodka).  You can see the police cruiser lights on the cactus for quite a few shots. You can also see lighting changes due to an occasional car driving by. Toward the end of my photography, I heard something walking around. Based on a snorting sound I also heard, I think there were javelinas nearby. The adventures of astrophotography in Tucson!

So here is the time lapse I put together...pretty much no processing. I may try to redo this later to bring out some more meteors. Oh, and watch this full screen in 1080p for best results.



I hope you have clear skies tomorrow night. The Geminids start a bit earlier than most meteor showers. I was getting good numbers by 11pm local time (for many you have to wait until much later!) So go out and take a peak, especially if you have nice weather.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

Open Blog - Thursday


You first.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

NATIONAL CHAMPION RACINE RAIDERS ANNOUNCE 2013 TRYOUT DATES

(RACINE) - The 2012 Semi-Pro BCS National Champion Racine Raiders have organized three tryout dates for prospective players looking to join the best team in adult minor league football in 2013. All three tryouts are free and will be held at the Tarble Recreation Center on the Carthage College campus in Kenosha, Wis.

The tryout dates and times are:

  • Saturday, January 19, 2013, from 9:00 a.m. to noon
  • Sunday, February 24, 2013, from 8:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m.
  • Saturday, March 23, 2013, from 9:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m.
Registration will begin at 8:00 a.m. for all three tryouts.

The organization requests that prospective players pre-register on the Play for the Raiders recruitment website at http://www.playfortheraiders.com.

The Raiders will begin their 61st season of operations and have won eight national championships. Players are treated to free postgame meals following each home game, receive complimentary tickets to games and get to play in front of an average of nearly 2,000 fans at home games. The team broadcasts all of their games on WRJN 1400 AM and online. Several other benefits are available to players as well.
 
For more information on the Racine Raiders, please visit http://www.racineraiders.com

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my frosted flakes!  How are you?  We actually had a dusting of the s-word the other night.  I don’t know if that was considered measurable precipitation, but I know we were approaching a record for the number of days without the s-word.  By the way, I have had nothing to do with the ongoing drought.  As much as I hate the s-word, I wouldn’t mess with the natural order of things.  Mother Nature wouldn’t allow me to do it, anyway. 

Last Sunday, our sterling Green Bay Packers once again trounced their foe, the Detroit Lions.  This Sunday, December 16, they meet their archrivals, the Chicago Bears, at noon in Soldier Field.  Packer – Bear games are always hard fought battles.  May the Packers be the hardest. 

The news is filled with Fiscal Cliff this and Fiscal Cliff that.  It is incessant, almost as bad as Christmas songs.  Between the two, I’d choose the songs.  The failure of our representatives to compromise on anything is disheartening and dispiriting.  I am tired of listening to the rhetoric over and over.  Bone tired.  Politicians should keep their dirty games out of the holiday season.  I am ashamed of the things that ‘my representatives’ do.  Tis the season to be jolly.  Let the politicians go to hell. This is the time for peace on earth and goodwill toward men. Let us rejoice.  Let us love.  Let us pray.

Driving west on Washington Avenue in uptown, I noticed that traffic was constricted to one lane by barricades, but I couldn’t see why.  A story in the Journal Times explained that the fa├žade of one of the buildings had pulled away and they feared for falling debris on pedestrians and vehicles.  Mr. Mayor Dickert says that the city is going to tear down the building posthaste.  I am afraid that we will be doing a lot of that.  They recently razed the fire-gutted building on the near north side of Douglas Avenue.  As more and more buildings are deserted, more will be torn down.  Oh my.

Have you finished your Christmas shopping yet?  Are you one of those who has your gifts wrapped up by September?  Or do you wait till the last minute, getting a rush from the commotion of all the other hurried shoppers?  Internet shopper or brick and mortar?  Personally, I have most of mine done, but there’s still a few items.  I like to wait until after Black Friday to do my shopping.  I bought a couple of things online, but I prefer to shop in person.  I like the hustle and the bustle of the crowds to a degree, but I won’t frantically fight for the last sale item.  It’s not worth troubling myself over a few dollars.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. 

Thank you, my sweets and sours, for perusing my blog today.  I much appreciate your presence.  Without you, this wouldn’t work.  Without you, there’s no point.  Without you, there’s no me.

Want to know what Santa is bringing you?  Ask madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.

The days continue to get darker and colder, but some people say it’s really going to heat up on December 21.  Bundle up, keep warm, and don’t let Jack Frost nip your nose.  Seriously, I heard he has herpes.   Molysomophobia!                  

Oprm Blog - Wednesday


One can only imagine what a super girl could do.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Rant du jour

My primary care physician is an Aurora doctor, so most of my tests, etc., are done through Aurora.  However, my psychiatrist is affiliated with Wheaton Franciscan.  Both medical groups employ robocalls to remind patients of upcoming appointments.

The robocalls from Wheaton Franciscan end with the statement, “Please arrive thirty minutes prior to your appointment time.”  The first time, of course, I arrived thirty minutes early.  When I asked the receptionist why I was told to arrive thirty minutes early, she didn’t even know what the robocalls contained.  She said, “Just ignore it.”  So I did. Still, it bothered me that I am given an appointment months in advance, but a robocall changes the time two days before the appointment.

I was proud that Aurora robocall reminders don’t tell you to arrive early.  Ha.  I was proud until I received my reminder call from Aurora for a doctor’s appointment this week.  It said to arrive twenty minutes early. 

I also received one from Wheaton Franciscan for another appointment this week.  Now they are saying to arrive fifteen minutes early, instead of thirty.  I complained to a number of people at WF about their robocall reminders.  Maybe someone listened.

Today I saw my Aurora doctor.  I got there 2 minutes before my appointment time.  I had to wait about five minutes before I was shown into an examination room. Nobody said anything about arriving twenty minutes early.

It’s insulting to be told to arrive early for appointments.  Time thieves are the worst thieves, for no one can recover what they take.

Arthur!!!!


K-Mart Christmas Meltdown


Somebody isn't getting a Christmas bonus this year.

Open Blog - Tuesday


Only two more weeks until Christmas.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Did someone say toilet paper was a great invention?

Got into a conversation of worlds greatest inventions, and someone said toilet paper. I got a better invention. The toilet seat bidet. Always thought I'd like a bidet, and found they make em into toilet seats now. I mean when you get old sometimes it's harder to get a grip of that paper. Sometimes you have the 3/4 roll, "Will it ever stop?" experience, and then there is that worst case situation. "What do you mean we're OUT!?? Well, not to worry any more. Down in Illinois they make something called a "Toilet seat bidet." Kid you not. I hear ya saying, "Whoa, too much info." but really, is too much ever enough?

A few months ago I finally said enough. I'd had a new electrical outlet installed last year behind the toilet when I did some wall work, and with the furthering of my disability, I needed a taller toilet for easier transferring to my chair. I went with a nice 2.5" taller than normal model, and with the low water use requirements, I got the Ba-WOOosh model at that. Al Bundy has nothing on me. The old toilet used four gallons per flush, and the plunger was still over used. The new one? The plunger has been retired. The problem is, when you get a nice new toilet, you need a nice new seat. What's a real man to do? Why get a real man's toilet seat. Oh yeah!

How about a heated seat with five heat ranges? Bidets are Water using apparatuses right? Well, how about five temperature water heat control? Bidets don't just squirt water, no. There is a water wand adjustment for front and back. Everybodies butt has a different area, and one size will not fit all. Of course for the women, they want their front AND back side done. Just program how far and it flies. Also water pressure adjustment, and aeration so the jet pulses. There is even a blow dryer with it's own heat settings! Self cleaning, retracting wand so it's business isn't out there when you sit down or are reading the paper unless you want it out there. Even a "Kid's" setting. And the very last thing in the manual, the one thing that made me go HUH? Was the feminine massage. I guess if she's in there longer than ten minutes, she'll be awhile. Truly, the Cadillac of toilet seats.

How much? Hey, class costs. $350. Best money I ever spent!

Navigating the Dark Marble


Last week at the American Geophysical Union meeting, NASA unveiled a series of new images of the world at night. You have probably seen lots of these images on the web (I have posted some of them here from time to time) but not quite with this resolution! Here is a sample of the image of the United States.
Now that's pretty good, but I have always wanted a nice interactive version where you could zoom in on it and pan around a bit. Well I got my wish with the Blue Marble Navigator. You can pan and zoom in on an area of interest anywhere on the world. The details you can get are amazing. You can trace out the U.S. Interstate highways system, fires from oil fields around the world, lights from the Japanese fishing fleet and the Trans-Siberian railroad. You can learn a lot but clicking around looking at lighting patterns. Here is a zoom of the Tucson area.
Tucson at NightYou can really see the boundaries of the town. I can even pick out Speedway (I live just off it) and where it dead ends into Saguaro National Park East, one of my frequent spots for astrophotography.  
Some of the older pics you see of the world at night have such low resolution, they make it look like there are lights literally everywhere. With these pics, you get a better and more realistic view of where the cities and lights are. Of course, the real problem is that these city light can be seen quite a ways out (sometimes hundreds of miles).
So go ahead, click around the map, find your hometown and see how it looks.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.

Useless Information


Did you know:
 
The late great Otis Redding who sang the hit song “Sitting on the Dock of the Bay” died in a small plane crash.
 
The plane crashed into a small lake just outside of Madison, Wisconsin.

Open Blog - Monday


I'm late in posting this. I hope that no one was inconvenienced.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Timmy writes to Santa


Dear Santa,
 
How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for  Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day. 

Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones
 

Dear Timmy, 

Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn’t want you to get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I’ll bring you something you can go outside and play with.
 

Merry Christmas,
Santa Claus
 

Mr. Claus, 

Seeing that I have fulfilled the “naughty vs. Nice” contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn’t want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don’t you think that a jibe at my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite?


Respectfully,
Tim Jones
 

Mr. Jones,

While I have acknowledged you have met the “nice” criteria, need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney’s have been on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.


Very Truly Yours,
S Claus
 

Now look here Fat Man,

I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I’m about to tweet my boys and we’re gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I’m taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!

T-Bone


Listen Pizza Face,

Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? “He sees you when you’re sleeping; He knows when you’re awake”. Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your shit wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, you’d throw up your Totino’s pizza roll all over the carpet of your mom’s basement. You’re not getting what you asked for, but I’m still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in you’re ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.

S Clizzy


Dear Santa,

Bring me whatever you see fit. I’ll appreciate anything.

Timmy


Timmy,

That’s what I thought you little bastard.

Santa