Saturday, September 24, 2011

Two Things

Number one: Please check out our Disclaimer sometime. It's at the bottom of the page.

Number two: This link was submitted by a reader: https://www.torproject.org/
It's about the Tor Project: Anonymity Online.

Keep those cards and letters coming, folks. Thank you for reading the JT Irregulars. Don't forget to patronize our sponsor, the Miracle Widget Company. "If it works, it's a Miracle."™

"Are You Normal?"

"Being unique is important, but are your quirks pushing you too far outside what is considered normal? This fun personality quiz will give you the answer. Find out if you're in step with normal America, or if you're marching to the beat of your own drummer."


Here are my results:

"Marvelous Maverick"

"Giddy-up partner. You're a maverick and don't know what the definition of normal is. That's a-okay because you're now part of a fascinating group of desperadoes. Wherever you ride, it's sure to be off the beaten path because it's way more fun to find the path least traveled."

"You . . . don't know what the definition of normal is." Spot on. I suspect, though, that "normal" is a disease which needs to be wiped out in my lifetime.
 

Friday, September 23, 2011

"Luxury Living... with a twist!"



Now that's the kind of home ownership I can relate to.

To see more of Gregory Kloehn's dumpster home and how to accessorize it, check out this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca2af6y1gSM

Four for Fridays

Hello everyone! Welcome back to another exciting episode of Four for Fridays-where there are no reruns! This week's questions are random...

1) Do you sing out loud to the radio in your car?

2) What do you like on your sandwich? (any kind of sandwich)

3) Do you prefer the heat or the cold?

4) Have you ever won a prize or a trophy?

Enjoy your weekend!

Open Blog - Friday


Happy Friday!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Bedtime Games

Bedtime Games

Installment 9

Make your best guess and.... GO TO BED!
Answer revealed tomorrow.


Yep, good luck with this one..... bwahaaahahahaha

Boy, was this a fast week, or what? Can't believe it is already Tuesday night.

I'm so proud of the size of my cucumber!  ;>  I had to throw in a few coins for point of reference.

This means I'm this week's winner! Yee haw.  For my prize, I'm selecting the Kennedy golf clubs purchased from E-Bay.  Someone named  J. Peterman was selling them for a good price. They are only slightly used, but come with a fantastic story.

(I was worried someone might guess it was a close-up of a petri dish from my last doctor visit.....)

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my zesty zinnias! How are you? It appears that summer may yet linger a little longer. I enjoy the mild days and cool nights. However, a glance at the calendar tells the tale: autumn is coming. That is a very beautiful time of year, too: the colorful leaves, the crispness in the air, the pumpkins and football games and long walks on short afternoons. We are blessed with all four seasons in Wisconsin, although some people, including myself, would label one of those a curse. Oh my. Well, I’m not going to even think about what comes after autumn. And don’t you dare say the “s” word!

Our intrepid and meritorious Green Bay Packers once again defeated their opponents, the North Carolina Panthers, this Sunday past. They are 2 and oh, my. Next, they face their hated and despised archrivals, the Chicago Bears at Soldier Field, this Sunday, September 25, at 3:15 PM. Grrr! I am tempted to put a curse on the Bears, but that would not be fair play. In any case, our glorious Green and Gold do not need anyone’s help. They will put the Bears into hibernation on their home turf. So predicts Madame Zoltar®©™!

Is it just me, or do the driving skills of the motoring public seem to decline with each year? I am almost afraid to drive or ride on the streets of Racine anymore. We have tolerated a lot, but things are getting out of hand. My auto insurance just jumped $73 annually. What is that about? I have made no claims and have had no tickets. I don’t even let Junior near my car. He’s 15 and all he talks about is when he gets his license. Ha! We’ll see. I’d be afraid to let him drive, period, let alone drive/dodge in Racine. And what do you think would happen to my insurance rate then? A young male with a probationary license – that ought to be worth about triple my current rate. Oh dear.

Remember last week’s video about the entertainment center falling over on the boy? Well, this week I present a similar, precautionary tale on the dangers of gambling. Instead of boys, it features an older man, who knocks something over. (There is no audio.)



Oh my. Although the gentleman in that video got the satisfaction of kicking in the machine’s face, I’ll bet you that his foot still hurts. Please don’t gamble, it’s not worth the risks.

[Confidential to the one who did not want to be named: Yes, you may sue for that. In fact, I encourage it. The more the merrier, my dear.]

Thank you beloved Irregulars and regulars for visiting my humble blog this week. I am so happy that you stopped by to read. It gives me great pleasure to give you pleasure. I look forward to our visit every week.

To know tomorrow today, don’t wait until yesterday: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy my lovelies. It’s time for fall harvest fests and apple cider. Watch out for the hard stuff. I drank a little too much of that one year and accidentally astral projected myself into a neighbor’s bedroom. That was very embarrassing. I love you all. Have a wonderful week. Gelogenic!

Open Blog - Wednesday


Have a bright and beautiful day.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Anybody got a spare chainsaw?

Neighbor had a tree lining our yards cut down today. The one guy says to me don't worry, we'll clean up any branches, leaves etc that fall in your yard.
I said cool!
Hey, I'll take the wood! LOL!! He says that would be great, then we don't have to stop to dump it before our next job... where do you want it?
This is what they left me.. LMAO!!!

Photobucket

You can see the stump to the right of the fence.

Zahns - Racine, Wisconsin

Zahns - for those of you that shopped there........a walk down memory lane.












Monday, September 19, 2011

Life worth living

At a wedding party recently someone yelled, "All the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living."

The bartender was crushed to death.

A Short Love Story

A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train.


Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying,.......... 'Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'

'I have a better idea,' she replied 'Just for tonight,...... let's pretend that we're married.'

'Wow!...................... That's a great idea!', he exclaimed.

'Good,' she replied. .............'Get your own fucking blanket.'


After a moment of silence, .....................he farted.

The End

Internatioal Talk Like a Pirate Day

Talk like a pirate ye scurvy dogs or I will make ye walk the plank!

The Fate of the Oasis

Tomorrow night, Tuesday, Sept. 20, Racine's City Council is supposed to decide who gets to manage the Oasis on North Beach for the next five years. The Public Safety and Licensing Committee has recommended that the concession be taken away from Mr. Paul Curtin, the man who turned the Oasis from a gang and drug infested hangout into a destination spot on North Beach. Please contact your alderman and tell him or her how you feel about this matter. Or better yet, show up at the meeting and tell them yourself. 7 PM, Room 205, City Hall.

It's fast and easy to send your alderman an email. If you don't know who your alderman is, you can find out here: http://www.cityofracine.org/City/Departments/Clerk/Poll.aspx?id=196

My previous blog on the subject: http://www.jtirregulars.com/2011/09/city-committee-recommends-different.html

The JournalTimes.com's last story on the subject: http://www.journaltimes.com/news/local/article_21b59afe-dec4-11e0-a734-001cc4c002e0.html

Open Blog - Monday


Boo!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

"Nudity Probable"



That came from a group that calls themselves "The Irregulars": http://www.youtube.com/user/IrregularsVideos

There's also http://www.irregularfilms.com/, which features "the work of Marco Sandeman."
 

Happiness Quiz

I scored 15 out of 15. 
If I know all the dang answers, then why am I not blissfully happy?

Someone asked about near death experiences at another Site.

Here is the one I shared.

I have too many of these stories. Why am I alive? No idea. One among many.

I was getting ready to go to work. My state is a helmet choice state for motorcyclists. I rarely wore one but this morning I had a premonition that said wear it. Okay, so I toss my helmet, leather jacket, and gloves on and go out to fire up the bike. The rural highway to the next town where I worked, was about ten miles of crank it up and blast down the road emptiness.

I was in my little burg on the way out of town. In front of me there was a Rambler American belching smoke, and in front of him a AMC Ambassador. (The AMC plant was in the next county over) The Ambassador took off at the city limit leaving me behind the smoke belchor. There were a few cars coming my way, and when they passed I cracked the throttle hard and passed the old Rambler. I had it up over 80mph and was thinking the next small hill will slow me down without needing to hit the brakes. That's when I saw the Ambassador in front of me about a block distance away. It seemed to be going much slower than it had been.

With the morning sun in my eyes, my vision was reduced so I tilted my head down for some shade and that's when I saw the left turn signal. To the right was a deep ditch with large chunks of jagged lime stone, a telephone pole about ten feet out, and some of those highway posts that are painted black and white. I couldn't take the path to the right as there was no path to take. I hit the brakes hard.

My rear tire started breaking loose and the front brake was near locked. I was headed for a full impact center punch of the Ambo's rear end and was still doing over 60mph. I tend to react faster than many. As the rear end came sideways a little more, I banged down two gears in desperation and grabbed a fist full throttle. Doing an imitation of Jay Sprinsteen, I did a feet up flat track corner attempt. I almost made it. Time ran out.

My bike hit the left rear of the Ambo and pushed the bumper and rear corner in two feet. The impact happened right behind my leg. I missed getting my leg crushed by inches. As I flew over the bike, and somersaulted, I broke the last knuckle on my right hand's ring finger. Except for literally shitting my pants as I impacted the ground and hoped there was no on coming traffic, that was the extent of my injuries. I must have been green from my full pants as the Officer on the scene didn't write me a ticket although he could have.

That's just one of many near death stories. I earned the handle "Mr. Wild" <-- (I'm Huck Finn here) for a reason. Buy me a beer sometime and I'll tell you another. I used to race, drive with a lead foot, and skydive. Yes, I'm lucky to be here, but what a rich life filled with memories.

JTI Comics

The Information Age Strikes Wildlife