Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my lads and lassies!  How are you? We’re finally inching our way up the thermometer.  It won’t be long before we’re complaining about the heat and humidity.  Life goes in cycles.  Psychos?  No, cycles.

And speaking of cycles, I’ll get in my weekly nag early about watching out for bikes and bicycles and kids.  In many collisions between bike and car, the car driver says, “I didn’t see the motorcycle.”  This, in turn, throws more fuel on the motorcycle exhaust noise controversy.  A guy pulled up next to me at a stoplight on a full dress hog.  He kept gunning the engine.  I yelled to him, “Get a Japanese bike, they idle fine.”  So he made more noise.  Sad.  I get very tired very early in the season of boom cars, motorcycles with straight pipes and/or loud stereos, and crotch rockets that curdle earwax as they scream by.  Why do these people feel that they have a right to inflict their noisy machinery upon us?  There are laws against this, but they are rarely enforced.  I guess it just comes with the territory in spring/summer/fall.

I know that today is Tax Day and I hope that none of my Irregulars gets hit too hard.  I usually get a refund. This year it was only $52.  I remember some years when I pulled in hundreds of dollars.  The world is a different place now.  I find myself competing against illegals, so-called “psychics,” who set up shop anywhere, even on a street corner, and undercut all of my prices on everything.  It’s very hard to compete when the playing field isn’t level.  I pay my taxes, but those fly-by-night operators never give a nickel to Uncle Sam.  If any of them give me any trouble, I’ll place the dreaded Curse of Zoltar® upon them.

Has anything rocked your world lately?  I feel so “blah” these days. Maybe it will disappear with warmer weather.

Señor Zanza and Junior have NOT finished spring cleaning.  Whenever I remind either of them about it, they make a half-hearted effort to pick up a few things.  Then they hope I’ll forget.  Men!  I’ll probably end up doing most of it myself.

Below is a short film/video entitled “Gift.”  It’s a Hungarian production from  I’m not quite sure what to make of it.  I went to the Facebook site.  Of course, it’s Hungarian.  I used Google Translate to try to get the gist of the video.  I still don’t completely understand it.

Anyway, it seems sad and we’ve had enough of that.  All of you, Irregular or otherwise, who read my blog make my week.  I love my readers.

Hungarian in one short lesson:

Enjoy the spring, my dears.  We paid for it by enduring winter.  Get out there and sprain something.  It’s the American thing to do.      


kkdither said...

Good morning, Madame. Please be wise about giving direction to others behind the wheel. People have lost all manners and sense. They are likely to pull out a gun and simply shoot at you. Our world has changed so much, and it surely isn't for the better. Sending my weekly love you you, and all the Irregulars.

Tender Heart Bear said...

Madame Z- I have one question is your name Zolta or Zoltar. Joking we all know what it is.

I know that the weather is getting warmer and that brings out the real crazy drivers. There has been to many car and motorcycle accidents already and it makes me crazy that people are so stupid to not see them on the roads. I am glad to see that some of the motorcycle drivers have stopped and helped the man on Durand Ave. Now they are going to get together and go for a ride with this man.

Have a great day everyone.

Toad said...

Madame, I too am tired of the damn noise. All day, and night I have to listen to these assholes without pipes on their pickups, and the Harley's that are as loud as they can make them. I complain, and NOTHING gets done. Soon I'm going to go out, and ask the Pickup drivers, If they get their ROCKS off by pissing me off, because they know I hate It. When they drive by they clutch, and give It a few kicks. The toothless kids should be driving by soon with the BASS speakers In the trunk. That's alway's fun. The "Town without Pity" has no laws.

OrbsCorbs said...

I still don't understand the video. Do Hungarians abandon their children?

Thanks for the blog, Mme. z.

Madame Zoltar said...

Thank you, Ms. Tender Heart Bear, for the correction.