Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my zesty zinnias! How are you? It appears that summer may yet linger a little longer. I enjoy the mild days and cool nights. However, a glance at the calendar tells the tale: autumn is coming. That is a very beautiful time of year, too: the colorful leaves, the crispness in the air, the pumpkins and football games and long walks on short afternoons. We are blessed with all four seasons in Wisconsin, although some people, including myself, would label one of those a curse. Oh my. Well, I’m not going to even think about what comes after autumn. And don’t you dare say the “s” word!

Our intrepid and meritorious Green Bay Packers once again defeated their opponents, the North Carolina Panthers, this Sunday past. They are 2 and oh, my. Next, they face their hated and despised archrivals, the Chicago Bears at Soldier Field, this Sunday, September 25, at 3:15 PM. Grrr! I am tempted to put a curse on the Bears, but that would not be fair play. In any case, our glorious Green and Gold do not need anyone’s help. They will put the Bears into hibernation on their home turf. So predicts Madame Zoltar®©™!

Is it just me, or do the driving skills of the motoring public seem to decline with each year? I am almost afraid to drive or ride on the streets of Racine anymore. We have tolerated a lot, but things are getting out of hand. My auto insurance just jumped $73 annually. What is that about? I have made no claims and have had no tickets. I don’t even let Junior near my car. He’s 15 and all he talks about is when he gets his license. Ha! We’ll see. I’d be afraid to let him drive, period, let alone drive/dodge in Racine. And what do you think would happen to my insurance rate then? A young male with a probationary license – that ought to be worth about triple my current rate. Oh dear.

Remember last week’s video about the entertainment center falling over on the boy? Well, this week I present a similar, precautionary tale on the dangers of gambling. Instead of boys, it features an older man, who knocks something over. (There is no audio.)

Oh my. Although the gentleman in that video got the satisfaction of kicking in the machine’s face, I’ll bet you that his foot still hurts. Please don’t gamble, it’s not worth the risks.

[Confidential to the one who did not want to be named: Yes, you may sue for that. In fact, I encourage it. The more the merrier, my dear.]

Thank you beloved Irregulars and regulars for visiting my humble blog this week. I am so happy that you stopped by to read. It gives me great pleasure to give you pleasure. I look forward to our visit every week.

To know tomorrow today, don’t wait until yesterday:

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy my lovelies. It’s time for fall harvest fests and apple cider. Watch out for the hard stuff. I drank a little too much of that one year and accidentally astral projected myself into a neighbor’s bedroom. That was very embarrassing. I love you all. Have a wonderful week. Gelogenic!


jedwis said...

Mme Z... I've got to call you on this one, normally I need a dictionary to understand your blog, which is good because I like learning words, but Gelogenic? Is that even a word? Just saying, lol

OKIE said...

Good Morning Madame. The nuts driving are not limited to Racine. A few months ago I was at the light getting ready to turn left. It turned green and just as I was getting ready to turn I noticed a fire engine coming. I stayed where I was and had the driver behind me laying on her horn. I had to roll down my window and point at the fire engine. I then got the "I'm sorry" gesture. People don't pay attention anymore.
And sadly, I must inform you (as one who sells car insurance) your rates will go up quite a bit with a young driver in the house. Driver training and a safe driver course will lower these rates.
As always thank you for your wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

Mr. jedwis:


Anonymous said...

Mdme Z I need your help in interpretation of the following. I had a dream last night. I my dream I was in my car approaching a railroad crossing. The lights started to flash, the bells were clanging and the gates were going down. I even heard the horn of the train as it approached the crossing. I looked down both directions of the track and saw no train. Then I looked in my rear view mirror and saw the engine of the train coming up behind me.

I am trying to attribute to why I had such a dream and seeking your help. The only thing I can think of was the 4 cheap beers I had before bed.

jedwis said...

That's good loggy, the cheap beers and too much alfred Hitchcock.

OK Mme Z... you got me. Rats

Mary, I hope you gave gave her a signal back, if you know what I mean. lol

kkdither said...

Madame, I implore you, do you see a job in my future that doesn't irritate heel spurs?

Teenage girls come with a hefty price tag for insurance, too. In fact, they are maybe worse with their cell phones and the texting while driving they do. Good grades seem to help a bit on the costs. Tell Junior to "hit those books!"

Anonymous said...

Oh dear, I am sorry Mr. Logjam, but everything that you told me about your dream indicates that you are pregnant. Oh my.

jedwis said...

Loggy pregnant? I want everyone to know right now... I had nothing to do with it.

jedwis said...

KK is using those heel spurs again? Ride um