Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The End Of The World Has Been Rescheduled For Oct. 21

"An Autumn Date for the Apocalypse"

"OAKLAND, Calif. — Here we go again. A California religious radio impresario who predicted — wrongly — that the end of the world would begin on May 21 revised his prophesy on Monday, saying now that the end is due in October.

"In a rambling, 90-minute speech, broadcast both online and on his stations, Harold Camping, whose Family Radio network paid millions of dollars to promote his prediction, said that he was stunned when the rapture did not happen on Saturday.

"'I can tell you very candidly that when May 21 came and went it was a very difficult time for me, a very difficult time,' said Mr. Camping, 89, a former civil engineer. 'I was truly wondering what is going on. In my mind, I went back through all of the promises God has made, all of the proofs, all of the signs and everything was fitting perfectly, so what in the world happened? I really was praying and praying and praying, oh Lord, what happened?'

"What he decided, apparently, was that May 21 had been 'an invisible judgment day,' of the spiritual variety, rather than his original vision of earthquakes and other disasters leading to five months of hell on earth, culminating in a spectacular doomsday on Oct. 21 — something he had repeatedly guaranteed. On Monday, however, Mr. Camping seemed satisfied with his new interpretation, which apparently spared humankind its months of torture for a single day of destruction."


Well, duh, of course, an invisible judgment day comes first. I thought everyone knew that.

Now we have a lot more time to party before the world really (no, really this time) ends. And there's not going to be any rolling time zone swath of destruction; it's going to happen all at once. The big unbang. That will show all those dummies who think that the world is going to end next year.

4 comments:

SER said...

Party now and avoid the August rush!

jedwis said...

I'm with you SER

kkdither said...

Good news! At least we can get in one more JTI party! Wooohoo!

Opinions, judgements: they are a dime a dozen! ;>

OrbsCorbs said...

It's kind of comforting to know that we are guaranteed five more months of existence. All governments should stop funding wars immediately and turn the money over to the people to party with.