Saturday, May 18, 2013

80 YEAR OLD MAN

An eighty year old man was having an annual physical. As the doctor was listening to his heart with the stethoscope, he began muttering, "Uh oh!"

The man asked the doctor what the problem was.

"Well," said the doc, "you have a serious heart murmur. Do you smoke " "No," replied the man.

"Do you drink in excess?" "No," replied the man.

"Do you have a sex life?" "As a matter of fact, I do!"

"Well," said the doc, "I'm afraid with this heart murmur, you'll have to give up half your sex life."

Looking perplexed, the old man asked, "Which half...the LOOKING or the THINKING???"

Dream Ticket


Democrat's 2016 Dream Ticket



My name is Barney Frank and I approve this ad...

Open Blog - Weekend


You, too.

Friday, May 17, 2013

Warblers

It's that time of year.... The warbler migration has finally reached its peak, sending flocks of birders into the woods with hopes of tallying up their life lists.

Wisconsin is the host to 42 species of these highly active and colorful birds. Personally, I have only seen 24 of these species. They spread across the state in a wide range of habitats with a majority of them taking a liking to dense woodlands. Finding them is not easy.

If found, photographing them can be a nightmare. They flit from tree to tree, branch to branch-always in motion..... It goes something like this: See bird. Focus in. Snap picture. Get a wing. Try again. Get a blur. Try again, miss it completely and get branches. Try again, bird gone. Pull hair out and cuss. Repeat process until you get lucky.

However, I have gotten lucky... The top picture is a Yellow Rumped Warbler taken at Shoop Park on 5/13/2013. The first one below is a Common Yellowthroat taken at Shoop Park on 5/17/2013. The next one down is a Yellow Warbler taken on Carver School near East Troy on 5/11/2013. The bottom one is a Black Throated Green Warbler taken at Grant Park in South Milwaukee on 4/30/2013.






If you wish, NOW is the time to see them! That is, BEFORE the leaves finish covering up trees, making them really difficult to see. One of the state's hotspots is Racine's very own Colonial Park, located on West High Street by the Root River. Presently, the Hoy Audubon Society is having warbler walks at Colonial Park on Wednesday nights at 5:30 during the month of May. That's were I have seen most of my warblers. I'll leave you with a picture of a Palm Warbler taken at the "Ponds" Subdivision in Caledonia on 4/23/2013.

Happy birding!  


     

The Last Party of the School Year!

We could not believe this when we went to Whitewater University to pick my daughter to bring her home. Driving down the main street on the college campus the garbage in the yards from the kids having a party the night before. You can say it usually is going out with a bang but for the kids it is going out with a hangover for the school year. When I seen the yards I told Drew I had to get a picture and write a blog about this. I was just wondering how many under age kids got fines for drinking. Here is the picture from the kids partying!


FOOTBALL SEASON


I KNOW YOU  ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO FOOTBALL SEASON.  WELL, HERE'S A LITTLE RECAP OF LAST YEAR.........
 
Alabama beat Arkansas
and Arkansas fired their coach
 
Alabama beat Tennessee
and Tennessee fired their coach
 
Alabama beat Auburn
and Auburn fired their coach 

Then Alabama beat Notre Dame, and the Pope resigned....... 

I sure wish the White House had a team

Four for Fridays

Hello everybody and welcome back! It has been a week of ups and downs, (mostly ups), but I survived and looking forward to a weekend of getting away. Anyways, some questions for you....

1) How many e-mails (on average) do you get a day?

2) What summer camps did you go as a child?

3) What is the most enjoyable experience your family has done together?

4) What topic of discussion did you find boring?

Enjoy your weekend!

Open Blog - Friday


If you get a paycheck like that, I want to be your friend.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Power Outage

Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call. The
house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-year-old
girl, to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he could see while he helped
deliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked. Heidi
pushed and pushed, and after a little while Connor was born. The
paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor
began to cry.

The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the
wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed.

Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the
first place......... smack his butt again!"

Open Blog - Thursday


That's great.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my fluid friends!  How are you?  The weather has kind of gotten warmer.  We’ve had a long winter and I’ll grab at any scrap of hope that I can, even if it’s just a few degrees.  I’ve seen daffodils and tulips flowering, so it must be spring.  If you go by the calendar, it’s spring.  If you go by the weather, it’s a schizophrenic mess.

Oh my, oh my, oh my! Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!  I was reading in the newspaper about the toddler from Mount Pleasant who was tortured to death.  Apparently, it was done by his mother’s boyfriend.  I don’t know the words to convey my loathing for child killers.  Unfortunately, Racine’s Circuit Court does not share my opinion.  The last child murderer we had tortured Brian Haws to death.  That killer received only two years.  I believe that Racine County Criminal “Justice” System is sick and getting worse.  They regularly dismiss the value of a child’s life.  That’s another “pattern or practice.”  Sometimes I’m ashamed to say what city I live in.

What does it do to a city’s psyche when one of its most prominent, and richest, members is accused of child molestation, charges are filed, and then the case just sits for month after month?  I think it wounds us.  We need healing STAT.

This is the time of year when the parties are just gearing up in Racine.  I can’t keep track of them all, but the JournalTimes.com calendar has complete info on what is happening around town: http://journaltimes.com/calendar/  Thank you, JournalTimes.com, for all that you do for us.

I predict that we’ll see this sooner than later:


Thank you for stopping by, my irregular and regular readers.  I love spending time with you.  You are why I blog.

Become a psychic:  madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Enjoy whatever good weather we get.  I’d advise you to pray for warmth, but then it might zoom up into the 90’s.  This is better sleeping weather, not hot and humid.   Leptodactylous.

Open Blog - Wednesday


I wish I had wings. And x-ray vision.

Monday, May 13, 2013

Useless Information


Did you know:

Basketballs come in four sizes. They are usually measured by their circumference, but this can be converted to diameter and radius easily enough. 

Size 3: circumference 22 to 22.5 inches, weight 10-11 ounces, recommended for small children (age 5-8). It has a diameter of 7 to 7.16 inches and a radius of 3.5 to 3.58 inches.
 
Size 5: circumference 27.25 to 27.75 inches, weight 16.6-18 ounces recommended for boys and girls under 12 years old (junior league). It has a diameter of 8.67 to 8.83 inches and a radius of 4.34 to 4.42 inches.
 
Size 6: circumference 28.5 to 29 inches, weight 20 ounces, recommended for boys and 12-14 and girls and women age 12 and up. This is the official game ball for women's high school, university and professional basketball. It has a diameter of 9.07 to 9.23 inches and a radius of 4.54 to 4.62 inches.
 
Size 7: circumference 29.5 to 30 inches, weight 22 ounces, recommended for men and boys age 15 and up. This is the official game ball for men's high school, university and professional basketball. It has a diameter of 9.39 to 9.55 inches and a radius of 4.7 to 4.77 inches

Open Blog - Monday


Never say never.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

The difference


The difference between the Supreme Court and the Ku Klux Klan is that the members of the Supreme Court dress in black robes and scare white people.

Happy Mother's Day!




We would like to wish all the Mom's a very Happy Mother's Day today and we hope you have a wonderful day!

Friday, May 10, 2013

"Dog 'Dancing' To Eminem 'Shake That'"



That dog has more rhythm than I do.

Four for Fridays

Hello everyone! Welcome back to Four for Fridays! It has been a busy week, working. At times it seemed to have flown by. Anyways, some questions for you...

1) How old is the oldest person you know?

2) What do you like better, ice cream or frozen yogurt?

3) Are you more of a talker or a listener?

4) What class taken in school has proven to be least useful?

Enjoy your weekend!

Open Blog - Friday


I'll pass it on.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

"5m80"



SER sent me a link to this. What a strange little film.

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my friendly friends!  How are you?  We finally had some decent weather, but the wind from the north cut like a knife.  Lately, I seem to underestimate how cool it is outside.  Teenagers wearing shorts don’t help matters any.  They will wear them even in the winter.  So I put on something light and then I have to return to retrieve a warmer jacket.  A day or two of some sun does not a summer make.

It seems that things are also heating up in City Hall.  Another round of ethics complaints against Mr. Mayor Dickert has been filed.  Mr. Alderman Kaplan is the subject of a current recall campaign.  The ethics of the Ethics Board are in dispute.  It appears that the city is engaging in systematic racism regarding minority owned bars.  Maybe they think if they shut down all of the black and brown places, “those people” will disappear.  This is what we know from the surface of Racine.  What’s happening below the surface, behind the scenes, is where the big decisions are made.  It’s tragic for the citizens of Racine that the city is run by stinkers.

On Friday, May 10, the Racine Astronomical Society hosts an Open House, 8:00 PM to 11:00 PM, at the Modine-Benstead Observatory, 112 63rd Drive, Yorkville.
 
“Think outside the cage! Celebrate Racine Bird Day, (on Saturday, May 11, 2013), from 11 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. at River Bend as we appreciate the native wild birds flying outside our windows.”

Of course, Sunday, May 12, 2013 is the most important day of the year: Mother’s Day.  Take extra good care of your mother on that day. Get her flowers or candy, or a new Jaguar.  Try carrying her around for nine months and see how you like it.  You should lavish love and praise and money on your mom every day, but even more so on Mother’s Day.  Do you understand that, Junior?  Get the message, Señor Zanza? 

Thank you one and all for stopping by to read my blog this week.  I enjoy your comments so much.  You can say what you want because we are family. 

Things your mother never told you: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

“They” are predicting high temperatures in the low 60’s to 50’s, with rain towards the end of the week.  Well, it’s better than snow, or is it?  I hope you all have a wonderful week.  

Open Blog - Wednesday


Say cheese!

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

"Christine Wu: Jenna's Song featuring Mercedes-Benz"

We received the following email today:
 
"Subject: Toxicity Video
"Hello,

"Thank you very much for mentioning Christine Wu in your blog posting related to the Toxicity cover song.

"In your posting, you commented that you could not find a page for Christine. I can provide. Below are her web site and FB pages.



"Also, here's a recent original music video by Christine, if you are interested to add a new post to your music category.

"Thanks very much!"

Useless Information


Did you know:
 
Is it safe?
 
A condom must hold 800mil of water without breaking to be safe to use!

Rare Packing Anxiety

I travel a lot, both professionally and personally (and frequently mixing them). When I got to Tucson over seven years ago and started traveling a lot, it was obvious I needed a better system. I bought myself a top end carry on for a pretty penny (and it was worth every penny). I quickly developed a system. Everything I needed had a place in the bag. I could tell if I had everything I needed simply by looking at it and seeing if there was an empty space. It worked well for over seven years...until it suffered a catastrophic structural failure on my way back from Chile.

Yes, I had to finally get a new bag. I loved my old bag, but they don't make it anymore. It was time to change models.

Again, I didn't skimp. Sure, I could get a cheap bag at Target or something but I find they are heavier and don't have near the packing capacity of a top line bag. Since my philosophy is never check a bag, I need to cram in as much as I possibly can. I have my carry on which goes in the overhead bin and my small backpack which has my computer, camera and a few lenses. That's it.

Luggage is not something I can shop for online...I have to hold it, open every little zippered compartment and try to envision where everything would go. It has to have a wardrobe, have a space for a computer if I decide I want to pack that in my main bag (I usually pack it in my combo computer bag/camera bag). I always get the international bag since I fly internationally once a year or so (bonus: international bags are slightly shorter but wider so my running shoes fit widthwise). I looked at my local luggage shop and spent quite a bit of time poring over three different bags. I didn't buy on my first trip...I went home, read reviews and then went back to buy (I couldn't get it cheaper online and he gave me a discount so it was a little less than ordering from Amazon).

I just packed and am sitting here experiencing packing anxiety. Things have different places now. I am not sure where everything's place is yet. Therefore, I can't tell if something is missing by looking. I probably won't be able to tell until a few days into the trip as I find out if I truly have everything.

If this trip comes off and I didn't forget anything, I hope I remember everything's new place.

Open Blog - Tuesday


Are you a Do-Bee or a Don't-Bee?

Monday, May 6, 2013

Just a rumor

Rumors are circulating in CA that radical Muslims are planning to go on a rampage in Los Angeles, killing anyone who is a legal U.S. citizen.

Police fear the death toll could be as high as 23

"Stairwell Illusion (Original Video)"

Bump! Guess what? That stairwell illusion is a fake. The video below from KickStarter explains the very intricate "myth:"



http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1123493397/the-stairwell-project-building-a-modern-myth?ref=live


Originally published on May 4, 2013 at 11:06 PM:

 

You could climb those stairs forever.

Open Blog - Monday


Who works in the pepper mines?

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Cheapest Meat



"Nesting peregrine falcon in Oak Creek delivers a Mother's Day gift"

From JSOnline:

"Mother's Day arrived a week early for a peregrine falcon nesting at the Oak Creek Power Plant, and the family already has its own Internet reality show.

"A live camera focused on the nest Sunday morning revealed three white fuzzy chicks, clustered in a nest of pebbles beside one egg that has not hatched.

"The mother falcon started feeding the babies breakfast around 10:10 a.m. They appear to have healthy appetites.

"We Energies also offers a blog on the falcons along with the history of falcons making their nests at its power plants."

http://www.jsonline.com/news/wisconsin/nesting-peregrine-falcon-in-oak-creek-delivers-a-mothers-day-gift-p49r5ik-206186321.html


Be sure to click on the live camera feed: http://www.we-energies.com/environmental/protect_wildlife_ocpp.htm

Odd question, I'm sure Freud would be able to explain why...

How do YOU eat SKITTLES?
One flavor at a time,,
  do you finish off all one color/flavor 
before moving on to the next,
mix them together, or just go for the
surprise of not knowing or caring what's next? 

05-MAY-13



Friday, May 3, 2013

"Firecracker Explodes A Cowpie Over This Kid"



These are males. This is what males do. God bless us.

Four for Fridays

Hello everyone and welcome back! It has been a long week filled with excitement and drama... Maybe too much of it. Anyways, some questions for you...

1) What kind of camera do you use?

2) If you had your own TV network, what would you put on it?

3) How do you think the American family would change over the next 25 years?

4) What was the last thing you took a picture of?

Enjoy your weekend!

Open Blog - Friday


Sing on.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Madame Zoltar, You Have Competition


Betty Boop is too much woman for Iggy.

Alderman Jim Kaplan Recall

From an anonymous email:

"Recall on Kaplan should be official as of today. They are going to meet to gather signatures on Saturday -

'The Kaplan recall committee has been formed and the official paperwork was given to the city clerk this morning. Reasons for the recall were 1. Ald. Kaplan engaged in discriminatory practices in his official capacity as alderman of the fourth district. 2. Abuse of power. The petitioner is Oscar Bueno the treasurer is Ray Bueno his brother. They own a bar  at 1600 Douglas Ave., it is not open as of yet.'
"A signature drive is being held this Saturday at 12:00 meeting at the bar. The hope is to collect all 300 plus signatures that day."
 
 
Obviously, some people are pissed off.  Kaplan and Alderman Greg Helding told the Common Council that they were threatened online. They provided no proof.  Now the Common Council is packing heat in City Hall while citizens are forbidden from doing the same.

"90 year old does double backflip"



Wow. I'm impressed.

Open Blog - Thursday


Yes sir, Mr. Yosemite Sam.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Ain't it the Truth


A Spotty Sunset


Low clouds dotted the western horizon at sunset in Tucson tonight. However, that is not all bad. They can slightly dim the setting Sun making it easier to photograph sunspots. Today there were plenty of good sized sunspots. These pics were taken with my Canon 60D and 70-300mm zoom lens (at 300mm).
IMG_5552
IMG_5567
If you want to compare it to today's Sun, check out the Spaceweather archive. Note, due to an effect called field rotation, the Sun is my pics is rotated 90 degrees clockwise relative to the image on Spaceweather.

Reprinted with permission from the Half-Astrophysicist Blog.
happy may day!

"A Boy And His Atom: The World's Smallest Movie"



"Published on Apr 30, 2013
 
"You're about to see the movie that holds the Guinness World Records™ record for the World's Smallest Stop-Motion Film (see how it was made at http://youtu.be/xA4QWwaweWA). The ability to move single atoms — the smallest particles of any element in the universe — is crucial to IBM's research in the field of atomic memory. But even nanophysicists need to have a little fun. In that spirit, IBM researchers used a scanning tunneling microscope to move thousands of carbon monoxide molecules (two atoms stacked on top of each other), all in pursuit of making a movie so small it can be seen only when you magnify it 100 million times. A movie made with atoms."

 
"Published on Apr 30, 2013
 
"How did IBM researchers move all those atoms to make the world's smallest movie? This short behind-the-scenes documentary takes you inside the lab. Meet the scientists, see how they made a movie with atoms, and find out more about their research in the field of atomic memory and data storage. See the world's smallest movie at http://youtu.be/oSCX78-8-q0"

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my thawing throngs!  How are you?  Spring may have sprung.  The weather has been beautiful the past couple of days.  I actually saw the sun. I thought maybe it had burned out.  The weather extremes that have affected the world are worrisome.  I sincerely hope that we have a nice summer.  I know it has to get hot on some days, but moderation is the key.  With the ozone layer depleting, the sun is like a microwave for your skin.  Just lard on some sun block with an SPF of 1,000 or higher and you’re good to go outdoors.

Another sign of spring is bicyclists on the streets (and sidewalks).  If you drive, please be very careful around bicycles.  Although they’re supposed to be subject to the same rules of the road as motor vehicles, the reality is that most of them do whatever they wish. There is no law enforcement regarding bicycles in Racine.  It is up to drivers to stay alert.  Always expect the unexpected.  Bicyclists often ignore stop signs, ride on the sidewalk, ride against traffic, and ride at night with no lights.  The other day, I was driving through an intersection when a man on a bicycle, riding against traffic, with no hands on the handlebars, and headphones on his head, cut directly in front of me.  I locked my brakes.  The man flipped me the bird.  Oh, that makes me so angry.  Racine rudeness is everywhere.  

My congratulations to Mr. Mayor Dickert for the complete whitewash of the ethics complaints against him and others.  You have to be darn smart to manage all the scams that he does and get away with them.  When he becomes President of the United States, we can say that we knew him when.  If he doesn’t go to prison first.

With the warmer weather also comes more parties for Racine.  This Friday is a First Friday downtown.  Saturday, May 4th, is Kiwanis Pancake Day at Festival Hall.  In Festival Park, the Lakefront Artists Fair will be held concurrently with Pancake Day.  Those are just the big things that I know about.  I’m sure there’s more going on, and there will be even more as the season progresses.   Racine is a party town, and getting drunk is the recommended way to achieve enlightenment.  Party hearty, Racine! 

Finally, my dears, I just learned of a website devoted to Racine’s nightlife: RacineNightOut.com, http://www.racinenightout.com/  That site has a link on the City of Racine homepage, so I’m sure it’s well connected.

Thank you for visiting my blog today.  I enjoy the company and companionship.  You light up my life.

Know the future before it becomes the past: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Enjoy this glorious weather, my friends.  We’ve been deprived so long that anything above 50 degrees calls for a celebration.  Get them old bones moving and have some fun.  Psychorrhagy!

Open Blog - Wednesday


It's May already.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

"Asleep at the wheel: City of Racine Ethics Commission"

Bumped again!  The Journal Times reports that the Ethics Board dismissed all complaints against lying John: http://journaltimes.com/news/local/govt-and-politics/car-ethics-complaints-dismissed/article_2ce8a830-b18b-11e2-9ebe-001a4bcf887a.html   Again, the board has two lying John cronies on it who refused to recuse themselves.  Lying John flaunts the law left and right. He doesn't play by the rules.  Why should we?

Racine Exposed also has a story up on this:  http://racineexposed.wordpress.com/2013/04/30/a-matter-of-trust/

# # # # #

Originally published April 26, 2013 at 8:58 PM: 

Bump!  I'm bumping this blog because Racine Transparency has put up a three minute video of Racine's Official Ethics Board Meeting on April 16, 2013. You can watch the video, and some commentary, here: http://racinetransparency.tumblr.com/post/48939655429/the-ethics-board-in-the-city-of-racine-is-being

I'm not sure if that's the old guy snoring at the beginning of the video, or just some microphone noise.  Of course, there is the travesty of two of lying John's buddies being on the board that is judging him.  It looks like they're really going to do it.  They're going to make a kangaroo court of the hearings.  That takes some audacity. It is spitting in the face of every Racine resident.  They're doing it because they can.  They're going to get away with it, too. 
# # # # #    

Originally published April 16, 2013 at 5:57 PM:

From Racine in Ruins:






















"Today at Racine City Hall there was a meeting of the City of Racine Ethics Commission.

"The above is a photo taken of a member of this group.

"I and others saw this member sleeping as the meeting was held and planing talked about for the upcoming Ethics complaints filed on Mayor John Dickert Other City of Racine Staff and members of the City of Racine Cable Commission over issues about CAR 25.

"Can the above Member do his job?   Is the public being served by this?

















"Is this how the City thinks how to best serve the public?"

http://racineinruins.wordpress.com/2013/04/16/asleep-at-the-wheel-city-of-racine-ethics-commission/


City Hall is a vicious joke to Racine residents.  We pay and pay and pay, and lying John lies and lies and lies.  Look at the above pictures. Our city government in action. Who do we complain to about the ethics of the Ethics Board?       

Open Blog - Tuesday


That's beautiful.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Useless Information


Did you know:
 
The Tootsie Roll Company in Chicago manufactures 83 million Tootsie Rolls per day.