Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my children!  How are you?  The weather outside is cool enough to be conducive to the joy of gardening, and whatever else you do outside.  Indoors it’s a little warmer and routine chores can be draining.  I drink plenty of fluids when I do housework.  Not all of them are water.  Ahem.

First, my condolences to the woman who lost a daughter in a car crash near Dodge and Main.  The mother was critically hurt and I assume will take a long time to heal.  I have heard that no loss is as painful as the loss of a child, no matter what age.   

Our proud and powerful Green Bay Packers stumbled in their opening game against the reigning Super Bowl champs, the Seattle Seahawks.  Oh well, at least the pressure is off for a perfect season.  Next, we’ll host the New York Jets [thanks for the correction THB] on Sunday, Sept 14, at 3:25 PM.  CBS is broadcasting the game.  It’s the Packers’ home opener.  The fans expect great things.  Give them to us.

In the Irregular Football League, my Screaming Psychics are in third place while Mr.OrbsCorbs Orbliterators are in fourth. As usual, Mr. hale-bopp’s Half-Astrophysicists are in first place. 

Getting Junior his school supplies, and getting him ready for school, caused a big hullabaloo around here.  He said he needed a new laptop because he spilled soda all over his current one.  Well, we can’t afford one just now.  OMG!  He threw a tantrum unlike I’ve seen for years.  Señor Zanza became so exasperated that he almost caved in and bought Junior one, but I said, “No!  Not until he apologizes for his behavior, and works out a payment plan for the laptop.”  Once Junior realized that his actions were working against him, he finally apologized, and he and Señor Zanza “worked out a deal” on a laptop.  Hmmm.

It’s nice, though, that Junior isn’t carousing around the house and elsewhere.  Schoolwork trains the mind.  I want so much better for him than I or my ex-husband had.  Junior might need a “little straightening out” after high school.  Maybe the Coast Guard would be in order.  They’d train him to be an officer and a gentleman, without much fear of getting blown to pieces in far off lands.  He could work his way through college.  He could be my personal lifeguard.

Oh my, that’s enough of that.  Poor Junior - I have his life all planned out for him.  I have yours planned, too.  You are going to come here weekly and have a good time.  You’re going to enjoy the love of Irregulars (and regulars).  We are going to be accepting of others. 

What’s a lot of straightening out?  Ask: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Enjoy as much of the warmth and sun that you can.  We’re definitely on the downside of the seasonal clock.  Watch out for school buses and children. Rantipoole!

9 comments:

kkdither said...

Another lovely blog, Madame. I applaud your efforts concerning leading Junior in an involved manner. If more parents continued to take an interest in their children as teens, our communities would have less violence, less crime and a more successful employment pool.

Beejay said...

How uplifting to read your blog today. Nice to read about proper parenting. Junior will appreciate you later in life.

Have a blissful day!

Tender Heart Bear said...

Madame another wonderful blog from you. One thing though the Packers are going against the N.Y. Jets Sunday.

I know what you are talking about with getting the kids their school supplies. That is the only thing I do not like about back to school. This is the last year we have to worry about that and I am so happy about that.

OKIE said...

A Wednesday without Madame is like a day without sunshine.

hale-bopp said...

Thanks for the kind words, but "as usual" is a stretch...I never really did that well until last year and we all know defending champions have a tendency to implode!

SER said...

Talk about being behind, I was totally unaware of the misfortunate accident downtown, that's terrible.

R.L.D. said...

Dear Madame,
Please talk some sense into your members who are abusing their power, resorting to name calling, and supporting censorship and corruption. You are ruining this website because of it, just as the community is being ruined by people turning a blind eye to what is really going on.

How sad and pathetic the JT Irregulars has now become where you change all of your rules because YOU WERE WRONG IN THE FIRST PLACE. This all happened because one or two of your members simply won't admit they were wrong, and are either confused, completely ignorant, or most likely friends with the people involved in the corruption.

SHAME! SHAME! SHAME!

Beejay said...

Please feel free to join in the conversation by posting a comment... New members are always welcome! We believe in free speech, but do not allow malicious comments or personal attacks. Blog authors manage their own blogs and retain the right to remove comments they deem inappropriate.

Madame Zoltar, your opinion, please.

ZuulsMinion said...

Phonies know not how to answer